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“You were made for me, you know. You’re just as sick and fucked up as I am.”
Typical. They all eventually abandon me. He’s just like the rest.
He’s somehow become both my protector and my nightmare.
Boys have it a lot easier than girls, I guess.
“Fuck the proper lineage and important family names. Find someone who sets you on fire every time you so much as look at her. Someone you can talk to, fight with, and fuck just as fiercely. And once you find that woman, don’t let her go,”
Find someone who sets you on fire every time you so much as look at her. Someone you can talk to, fight with, and fuck just as fiercely. And once you find that woman, don’t let her go,”
“It’s like my thoughts are consumed with nothing else but you. I jerked off last night thinking of you. I jerked off again this morning thinking about you. We haven’t even fucked yet, and I’m fucking obsessed.”
“You’re always what I want.”
“You make me want things I can’t have.”
“Why the fuck do I always want to hurt you?” He sounds tortured. And if he’s trying to threaten me, it’s not working. I cup my breasts, fondling myself. “You can’t.” “Why not?” He frowns. “Because I like the way you touch me too much.”
“You’re as fucked up as I am.” I nod. “We’re one and the same.”
“I’m not using a condom,” he mutters, releasing his hold on me so he can reach between us, his hand gripping around the base of his dick. “I want to feel you.”
Whit Lancaster has become a dangerous obsession, and I don’t know how to get him out of my head.
“He looks at you as if he wants to eat you up.”
“You fucking like it, considering you’re just as disgusting as me.”
“We make no sense,” I say in agreement. “Yet you’re all I can think about.”
“Little whore. I bet you like it when I tell you how much I want to hurt you.”
“Want me to fuck you now?” He tilts his head to the side, contemplating me. “Maybe you want to get on your knees and choke on my cock.”
He’s damaged. Scary. More intense than usual. I don’t understand his thoughts, his desires. They’re wrong. Demented. Sick. But they satisfy something inside of me I’ve never experienced before. Something I struggled with for years. Something I fought against. I always called it ‘the darkness,’ and when he reads my journal, he must recognize it. We’re the same, Whit and me.
“Why do I always want to fuck you? Why?” He increases his pace.
The realization slams into me. I don’t care how dark he claims to be, or how cruelly he treats me. There’s a wall there, but it’s crumbling. Much like the remnants of this building that surround us. I’m patient. I’ll tear down those walls and I’ll find the soft underbelly of his beating heart.
“I hurt you,” he says, his voice raw. “You’ve hurt me before,” I remind him, ducking my head when his fingers come closer to the spot between my legs. “I’ve never marked you like this.” He smooths his hand over my butt, the touch somehow more intimate than usual. “Are you okay?”
“Don’t you dare call me sick when you’re just as fucked up as I am. We’re both like this. You love it when I tell you what to do. And I like it when you fight against me.”
“I want to do everything with you,” I admit softly.
I still yearn to dress up. To pretend to be someone I’m not.
I’d rather have him be mean toward me than act like I don’t matter to him at all. Ambivalence is the worst feeling you could ever have for someone, and I think that’s what Whit has for me.
“I’m not a nice person, Summer. Haven’t you realized that by now? I’m spoiled and mean. Over-indulged and dumb. I’m not going to amount to anything in this world, but the bar is set pretty low, so what would anyone expect?”
It was difficult, going to her yet keeping myself removed. Fucking her as if she didn’t mean anything to me. Using her without any emotion, good or bad. She could tell something was wrong. I saw it in her eyes, in the way she’d watch me. She closed herself off too. She’s good at that.
Maybe that’s why we’re drawn to each other. We’ve seen and done so much for being so young. I’m jaded as fuck, and so is Summer. But to really be with her…
“His eyes follow you everywhere you go when you’re in the same room together,” she says.
“I thought you liked us submissive.” He grabs hold of my arm, yanking me to him. “I prefer them argumentative, so then I can put them in their place. Like you.”
If he were to lay a single finger on Summer, I’d break every one of them. Crack a few bones in his hand too. Fuck that guy.
“Fucking beautiful,” he mutters under his breath. “Addicted to your pussy, swear to fucking God.”
Jesus, I have issues. All of them stem from my need for Summer.
No way can I admit how good this feels, having her lie with me, our naked bodies close. She tangles her legs with mine, before slinging one across me. The heat of her pussy presses against my thigh and my cock grows even harder. I want inside her. I’d love nothing more but to fuck her all night long.
“I don’t like the idea of you with anyone else.” “I fucking hate the idea of you with someone that isn’t me,” I say fiercely,
I want her mouth on me. I want inside of her. So fucking bad, I’m borderline desperate with need.
I think he’s baffled. He certainly looks baffled. And still turned on,
No one has held me like Whit just did in so long. It felt good. Being in Whit’s arms, wrapped all around him, felt… Like I belonged. With him.
But I’m not perfect. I’ve done things, said things that I’m not proud of, and that’s okay. We make mistakes and we’re allowed, because we’re only human, right?
Last night had been a realization. This girl is under my skin. We’re connected. We share the same birthday for fuck’s sake. I don’t want to push her away because of some sort of obligation I’m being forced into.
“I want to watch you walk around the party tonight and know that my cum is dripping down the inside of your thighs. I want people to smell it on you when you stop and talk to them. I want people to know you just got fucked and you belong to someone else. To me. Do you understand?”
I’m fucked. I don’t know when it happened, or even how exactly, but I am so far gone over this girl. I don’t even know what to do with myself anymore. Or with her.
I can still smell her. Taste her. The feel of her pussy gripping my dick, Jesus. I can’t get enough of her. It’s worrisome.
Maybe that’s why we’re so—perfect together. Because we are. I can admit this. I’m all sorts of fucked up and so is she. I’m mean to her and the girl likes it. She gets off on it. I call her a whore and she takes it as a compliment. But she’s my whore. No one else’s.
“I haven’t changed. I’m still selfish. Give me back my toy,” Whit demands, his deep voice wrapping all around me, leaving me feeling weak. “What you’re currently holding onto, belongs to me.”
He can have me any way he wants me. “I want it.” He grins, looking pleased. “Oh, you’re going to get it.”
I’m more frightened of the day that comes when he’s no longer interested in me anymore.
“Normal is probably the wrong word.” He licks my neck, running his tongue down the length of it. “We fit, Savage. You and me.”
“You looked like a fucking queen,” he murmurs, his voice full of pride. “That’s why I claimed you, Savage. I didn’t want anyone else taking what was mine. My queen. You belong to me.”
