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She could already picture that familiar look of disappointment on his face. Georgie tried to swallow, but her mouth had gone dry. Stupid and sentimental.
She’d spent her entire life straining under the pressure of impossible expectations, and unfortunately, not even the end of the fucking world was enough to release her from them.
He laughed, his moss-green eyes morphing into half-moons. Jax carried a severe expression most of the time—tense, like he was always waiting for something to go wrong, for the other shoe to drop. So on the occasions when it thawed, it was difficult to look away.
If she gave up on this vaccine, she’d have to carry the guilt of every new death caused by the infection, knowing she had the chance to stop it. That, coupled with the fact that without it, they were stuck at Haven for the foreseeable future, and being confined to this town and this job for the rest of her life might actually kill her.
So far, the distraction of the party had been working, the music drowning out everything else. But the more she drank, the more her mind drifted. The house, the music, the alcohol. It all reminded her of Mabel.
Governor Hudson, the one in charge at the beginning, tried to fix things by cutting the Locals’ rations, but that was like throwing gasoline over the flames. It drove an even larger wedge between the residents. Things were better now, but the prejudice was still there, hidden just beneath the surface.
“Just like your traitor mother,” he shouted over the music. The words sent a jolt through Georgie’s body, and before her common sense could catch up, she was back in front of Caleb. She swung hard, the impact snapping his head to the side. As he curled in on himself, his friends finally rushed to his side.
“Come on,” he whispered, pushing the hair off his forehead with a quick swipe of his hand. “I need to see you. Don’t disappear on me.” One more sweep of the street below, then Adam let the rifle hang across his chest. Okay. Fine. I’ll come find you.
He never flinched at the thought of his own death. In fact, he’d welcomed the end wholeheartedly on multiple occasions, only to be denied at the last second. But the thought of losing Oliver terrified him. When he opened his eyes again, Oliver was right in front of him, his soft features tight with worry.
For a short time, it was comfortable. Adam had hoped he could settle in there, but like every other place, the walls started to close in. He never felt like he belonged, and the mask he wore to pretend he did was draining. He only stayed because of Oliver.
“For the record,” Flora said, giving Adam a withering look as he took the bottle again, “I don’t give enough of a shit to hate you. But I could definitely do without that arrogant face you make.” A half smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.
“I know you do,” he said. “You’re so much like your mother.” Georgie flinched. She’d been prepared for a fight, but the sudden shift left her disarmed. Shaken.
Do something! Georgie screamed at herself. But she was always stuck there, watching as one of the figures took something from her mom’s hands. You’re going to let her die. Just like Mabel. “Wait!” her mom shouted as the figure lifted an arm. Bang! Georgie shot upright, gasping for air, the sound of that final gunshot still ringing in her ears as she struggled to catch her breath.
With her dad gone, there was nothing to keep Haven from falling apart. There was no backup plan. Haven was slowly, but surely, going to crumble.
A small outbreak of something, and the Locals would be the first ones to die. That was if the Vitals didn’t panic and kick them out to conserve supplies. One thought overwhelmed the rest: if she did nothing, she could lose Jax.
She wasn’t a superhero. She wasn’t a soldier. She wasn’t even a real medic. She was just Georgie. And she wasn’t strong enough to handle this.
“We can’t save everyone,” her mom had told her. “Not right away. But nothing is ever hopeless. The darkness won’t last forever. Things will get better.” She wrapped her arms around Georgie’s heaving shoulders. “We’ll make sure of it. You and I, we’re as strong as steel and as stubborn as mules. Maybe even more stubborn than your father.” Georgie had breathed a tearful laugh. “Nothing is going to stand in our way.”
The empty farmhouses seemed out of place—pallid and lifeless in comparison. Relics left behind by a near-extinct species. The dark windows seemed to watch as she passed, and Georgie avoided letting her eyes linger too long.
She and Jax were walking side by side now, still reflexively finding their way to each other despite everything, but his frown hadn’t faltered, lines still etched deep into his forehead. Georgie may have been quick to anger, but he clung onto it like a life raft.
“What if it’d been you?” Georgie gave an irritated shrug. “I don’t know. Then I guess you’d shoot me.” She regretted the words as soon as they were out of her mouth. Why couldn’t she think before speaking? His eyes dropped, his face twisted like she’d just gut punched him.
He paused, his fingers nervously tapping against the concrete as he searched for the right words. “I’m the only thing in this fucked up world I have some sort of control over, and sometimes I’m terrified I’m messing it up.”
Quiet settled in around them, and her mind drifted back to the church. That room. The green glow of spores. The same thought repeated in her mind: If they had a vaccine, Alvear would still be here. Jax wouldn’t have had to make that horrible decision. Nobody else ever would again. But what else could she do? There were no more notes to search through. No answers to uncover. She’d hit a dead end. It was clear she was missing something, but she’d searched everywhere.
“You know it’s not on you to save the world, right?” he added. Georgie wished that was true. She was so tired. But this was a chance to do something good. Something that could save the lives of everyone left. Something her mom had worked so hard to accomplish. Her mom was gone. Her team, too. If Georgie didn’t figure it out, who would?
The closer they got to the city, the more unsettling the silence became. Before Haven, when Georgie and her parents lived downtown, this kind of quiet didn’t exist. Even in the dead of night, after the traffic had slowed and the streets had all but emptied, there was always movement. Always sounds and lights, signs the city was still alive. The wail of ambulance sirens, the roar of the L train, the rumble of airplanes overhead. Comforting. Constant. She hated the quiet.
“Wait! Okay!” Jax popped out of cover, hands up. “I’m setting it down.” His movements were slow and deliberate as he placed his rifle on the blacktop in front of him. No, you idiot, run! She couldn’t watch him die. She couldn’t lose him too.
Jax hesitated a moment, his brow furrowed. “Roger,” he muttered. “We’ll handle it ourselves, then. I’ll keep you updated. Out.” He scrubbed a hand over his mouth as he released the button and turned off the radio. “That went well.”
Adam’s head snapped up, the name sending a jolt through him, and the cheerful mask he kept firmly in place slipped. In a flash, he was somewhere else. A room. A bed. A prison. You are to do as you’re told.
“Do you trust me?” They’d only known each other for a week, but Oliver nodded without a second of hesitation. “Yes.”
“I really wish you’d wait here,” Jax muttered. Was he ever going to give this up? She lifted her chin and narrowed her eyes. “And I really wish you’d stop being such a pain in the ass.” Adam chuckled.
Her mind screamed at her to hide as Adam stepped out in front of the door and grabbed the long knife. What was he doing? She shot him a glare, and he responded with a slight tilt of his head and a sly grin. Trust me, it seemed to say.
To prove she could be better than her parents, at least in one way. But in a world of violence and cannibals and a fungus that can kill you by proximity, it was stupid and selfish to think about bringing more people into it, so she’d tossed the dream out.
“Then I want you to stay.” She had smiled then and settled back in the grass, her head on his leg. “I’m not going anywhere,” he’d whispered.
There was a brief time, when he was a kid, that he wanted to be a firefighter, but he grew out of that pretty quickly. He had no desire to be a hero. Most of the people he’d met throughout his life weren’t worth saving.
Malacai smirked. “Problem, Red?” Just keep quiet, Adam begged her silently. I can get you out. Don’t do anything stupid. “I want to go first.” Like that.
Then Oliver showed up and shook everything he thought he knew. Adam braced himself for the inevitable. Kept waiting for it to crumble—for him to leave. But he never did. Oliver was the only light left in the darkness around him.
The voice was front and center now. Adam’s hair clung to the layer of sweat on his forehead. He curled forward, pressing his palms to his closed eyelids as he pleaded for it to stop. Everyone who cares about you dies, but you keep living. You don’t deserve it. Adam swallowed hard. I know, he replied silently.
Adam’s frown deepened. She was right. It was his word against hers, and he wasn’t exactly a shining example of stability right now. Or ever, really.
“Yeah,” Adam said. “He wanted to stick around to make sure you were okay, but Kye’s not very trusting of strangers, so he’s got a shadow.” Adam smirked. “I’d hate to have Flora following me around all day. Poor guy.”
“It’s always been a mess,” he said. “It’s just more noticeable now. But if things like love and beautiful boys don’t matter, then what does?”
“But we’ve got some pretty great people in this new life,” Adam said with a shrug. “We do.” Georgie gave him a warm smile, then turned and leaned back against the planter. “I’m really glad I met you, Adam.” “Yeah, I’m pretty great.” He grinned, but it took too much effort and faded quickly. “I’m glad I met you, too.” And it surprised him how much he meant it.
The building was there, clear in Georgie’s mind. The bodies. That final gunshot. She swallowed hard. “It’s a long story.” The depth of sadness on Desmond’s face made her heart ache. “Yeah, they all seem to be that way lately.”
She swallowed hard, nearly losing the last of her composure. “Hey, at least I got it looked at this time.” He shook his head, the corner of his mouth lifting. The realization hit her then, crushing the butterflies that had filled her stomach. How was she supposed to leave? How was she supposed to tell him goodbye?
Georgie’s nails dug into his shoulder blades. If she never let go, if they just stayed right here, she’d never lose him.
Clearly struggling to keep her composure, Kye pinched the bridge of her nose. “You survive the end of the fucking world just to play a perpetual game of Russian roulette with fate. Both of you. Stop trying to get yourselves killed! What are you tr—” “Open the gate, Travis,” Adam interrupted, his words slow and measured, edged with something sharp.
She hoisted herself gracefully onto the edge of the stage, perched with one long leg folded over the other, and memories from abstract nightmares flashed in Georgie’s head. “Welcome back, Georgie.”
The woman’s eyes darkened. “Want to know a secret?” she asked, leaning in close, her words barely more than a whisper. “There are no immune.”
“I don’t blame you for any of it,” Adam said, grabbing his hands. “I understand why you did it. I’d burn this whole damn city to the ground for you.” Oliver gave him a sad smile. “I’m not worth the gasoline.”
“Jaxon Hale, I swear to God, if you die on me, I’ll never forgive you.” He breathed a tired laugh.
He was right. They needed a plan. But her anger burned hot, and she was determined to hold on to it. To let it build to a roaring fire. These people did matter, and she was going to fight for them. For everything she lost and everything she had left. Georgie wasn't sure why Desmond had let her live, but she was sure as hell going to make sure he regretted it.
