How to Become the Dark Lord and Die Trying (Dark Lord Davi #1)

by Django Wexler

The thing about manipulating a crowd is that you don’t have to convince everyone. Ninety percent of the shouting comes from 10 percent of the mob. Get the loudest voices

on your side, and the rest will convince themselves.

Anyway, long story short, it’s time for another training montage. This time I’m ditching Survivor and going straight to Kenny motherfucking Loggins, because that’s how you get shit done. Welcome to the Area of Intermediate Peril, baby.

Pyrvir haul wheelbarrows, carry heavily laden packs, and generally bustle on all sides like a scene from a Robin Hood reboot.16

If the director were, say, Michael Bay, Nottingham had a lava moat, and everyone was shark-toothed dwarves with wild hairdos. Shit, I’d probably watch that.

Can we make “combat watersliding” a thing? Ideally an Olympic sport?

Fresh bread! Bless you, semi-agricultural pyrvir. Fruit and veg and meat are all right for a while, but I really get to craving those processed carbs sometimes. You have no idea how many people I’d be willing to kill for a Twinkie.