The fact that I turn to the late nineteenth century for advice says a lot about how complex and confusing parenting has become. Ma and Pa understood that the job of a parent is to raise self-sufficient, capable, and ethical adults. I envy their clarity, because sometimes, I’m not sure what my job is. One day it is to be my son’s friend so he will feel comfortable enough to confide in me, the next it is to stand firm as an authority figure and teach him to write thank-you notes whether he wants to or not.
