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“Word on the street is, some of the single players from the Vancouver Agitators are in town and they’re staying at Moxy Miami.
I make my way to the pocket door that leads to the bathroom. It screeches open, a sound so horrifying it makes me believe the trees that sacrificed their lives to make the door are suffering through a slow, agonizing death.
“I record everything, and then it’s my choice when I retire if I want to contribute them to the royal archive. It’s not a requirement.” “Well, still, I’d like to know your thoughts on me.” “You really don’t,” he answers.
Freaking Torskethorpe and their healthy bodyguards and whatever the hell Keller is. Maybe instead of running, they just eat a banana. That’s healthy.
“You matter most, Lilly. Even if you decide you don’t want to be part of the royal life and you go back to Miami, until that time has come . . . you . . . matter . . . most.”
“Don’t look at me like that.” “Like what?” I ask, trying to play the clueless card, because I know exactly how I’m looking at him. Like he’s easily the sexiest, most delicious man I’ve ever seen, and now that I’ve had the pleasure of regarding him in nothing but a pair of briefs, I won’t be able to think of anything other than his tight, muscular body or his thick, heavy bulge when he’s in the same room as me. In a low, commanding voice, he says, “Like if I gave you the chance, you would drop to your knees and swallow my come.”
“You seem irritated with me,” I say. “What on earth would give you that idea?” he huffs. “Well, the sarcasm in your voice, for one, and your lack of patience, for another. But there’s something you need to know, Keller. I’m irritated with you as well.” He turns around and leans against the sill now, arms crossed. “What could I have possibly done to irritate you?” Well, he keeps showing up with clothes on. These lectures would be far more riveting if he was naked.
he’s still so freaking yummy to look at, even though he’s absolute torture to be around.
We’re not fucking going there.” “You know it would be good.” “It would be fucking great,” I respond. “But it’s not happening. There are too many complications, too many unknowns.” I swallow and then say, “And if I have one taste, I know I won’t be able to stop.”
“Don’t. Move,” he says, his voice like a crack of thunder. It stills me. It penetrates my soul. It sends a flutter of chills over my arms. Ooo, yes, say it again. “I’ve set a plate holding a cup of water on your head. Anytime you slouch, lean too far forward, rest your arms on the table, or have any sort of improper posture, you will get wet.” Little does he know, I’m already wet.
“All you want is to get under my skin.” He lowers his head so his lips are at my ear, as his thumbs stroke the underside of my breasts, causing me to nearly melt in his grasp. “Guess what, Lilly. You’ve been under my goddamn skin since the moment you showed up at the Moxy in that dress. You don’t have to keep trying, you’re there. You’re buried in my goddamn veins, pumping my blood, causing me to go fucking crazy in my head because I’ve never wanted to fuck a woman as much as I want to fuck you.”
There, see, with my eyes closed and her far away, this will be completely fine. “Mmm,” she moans. “This feels so good.” Or maybe not.
“Welcome to my hell, Lilly. I’m fucking turned on every goddamn time I’m around you.”
“I’m demanding.” He moves me faster over his lap. “I won’t always give you what you want, and I take everything I need. I’ll control you. I’ll possess you. I’ll make it so if you ever leave my bed, you’ll never be satisfied by anyone else.”
“Don’t pull away, Keller. Please don’t.” “That’s the fucked-up part, Lilly.” He lowers his head, shaking it. I wait with bated breath as he gathers himself, and when our eyes lock again, he repeats, “I can’t have you, but I also can’t NOT have you.” His voice is a growl, a proclamation, and before I can respond, his mouth descends upon mine. And he kisses me. Actually freaking kisses me.
I didn’t kiss her. So, yeah, she’s going to be a wretched witch all day.
I’ve snapped. She’s broken me. There’s only so much I can take, so much denial I can face before I crack. Last night, I bent. Just now . . . I broke.
“You want to play with fucking fire, well, you just set off an inferno,” I say, my forehead pressing against hers.
“Let’s get one thing straight right fucking now,” I say, breathing heavily. “You might be a future queen, but when it comes to the bedroom, I’m your goddamn king. Got it?”
I sink into his kiss, and he washes away every last bit of irritation I was just feeling by this simple connection. His affection is lethal, and I fear how he’ll use it in the future.
Her lips return to mine, her fingers pulling on my hair, and something rips through me. I think it’s the last thread of my self-control.
“You’ve got to be the dirtiest future queen ever.” “I’ll wear the title proudly.”
Promise me you’ll protect yourself because you’re protecting what matters most to me.” He wets his lips. “I already lost my parents. I can’t lose you as well.”
Life changes constantly, and if you live in the past, you’re going to miss it.”
“Would you like some iced tea?” she asks as she lifts a pitcher. “That would be lovely,” I say, feeling as though I’m in some out-of-body experience where I’ve turned into a posh elitist who says things like “that would be lovely.” Normal response before would’ve possibly been something like . . . I’m dying of fucking thirst, so yes, please. I’ve evolved.
Keller attempts to console me, but I step away. “No, don’t touch me. I want to know what made you act like I didn’t matter today.” “You do matter, you matter—” “Don’t fucking say it.” I point at him. “If I mattered most, I wouldn’t be here, yelling at you, my heart breaking with every breath I take.
Fear doesn’t determine your future. Fear is what holds you back.
Before he releases my fingers, he gives them a gentle squeeze . . . three times. My breath stills in my chest as my pulse roars through my veins. Three squeezes. It’s what my parents used to do to tell me they loved me.
I need you. I broke us. It’s broken me.
we walk up to a beautiful landscape depicting the ocean. Familiar hot springs are nestled in the corner, and as I get closer, it hits me. I know exactly where this is located. My eyes drift to the name of the picture. My First and Only Love. And then underneath the title is the name. Keller Fitzwilliam. What on earth? There’s no way.
“Unconditional love, Lilly. You can’t control it. It just sits there, buried in your heart, forever. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the type of love you two share. It almost seems as though you both breathe deeper when around each other. That’s something to hold on to.”
I desperately want to say, How the world spins, Only when you are near. But the best I can write, Is always mine, eternally yours.
As if I haven’t been able to breathe the last couple of weeks, he fills my lungs with life, reclaiming what’s his.
