The Noticer: Sometimes, All a Person Needs Is a Little Perspective

by Andy Andrews

“What would you think if I told you that, yes, your bad choices and decisions have had a part in your ending up under this pier, but beyond that, under this pier is exactly where you should be in order for a future to occur that you can't even imagine at this point?

“Think with me here … everybody wants to be on the mountaintop, but if you'll remember, mountaintops are rocky and cold. There is no growth on the top of a mountain. Sure, the view is great, but what's a view for? A view just gives us a glimpse of our next

destination — our next target. But to hit that target, we must come off the mountain, go through the valley, and begin to climb the next slope. It is in the valley that we slog through the lush grass and rich soil, learning and becoming what enables us to summit life's next peak.

you are right where you are supposed to be.

Think. Learn. Pray. Plan. Dream. For soon … you will become

whatever you focus upon, increases.

If you set your mind on loss, you are more likely to lose … But a grateful perspective brings happiness and abundance into a person's life.

“Consider this: when we are happy and enthusiastic,” he said, “other people enjoy being around us. True?”

“A life filled with opportunities and encouragement finds more and more opportunities and encouragement, and success becomes inevitable.

When a person is negative, complaining, and disagreeable, other people stay away. And that person receives less encouragement and fewer opportunities — because no one wants to be around him.

“Most folks figure a true friend is someone who accepts them as they are.

But a true friend holds you to a higher standard. A true friend brings out the best in you.

“A best friend,” he said softly, “will tell you the truth … and a wise best friend will include a healthy dose of perspective.

“Yes, you are there all day long,” Jones avowed, “but not with her. Your wife speaks the dialect of quality time. She craves time alone with only you. That is how she expresses her love. And for you to have a wife who is happy and who feels secure in your love, you must learn to speak this dialect. It is expressed by giving her periods of undivided attention, listening to the details of her day, her dreams and concerns.”

It's time to stop letting your history control your destiny.

“Well, that's why smart people get tripped up with worry and fear. Worry … fear … is just a misuse of the creative imagination that has been placed in each of us.

you have to defeat those thoughts with logic.

Instead, direct your mind to calculate the odds.

“Forty percent of the things you worry about will never occur anyway.

“Thirty percent,” he said, looking up again, “of the things you worry about are things that have already happened — in the past.

twelve percent of all worries have to do with needless imaginings about our health.

“Ten percent,” he said next, as he wrote, “would be petty-little-nothing worries about what other people think.

“Eight percent,” Jones answered, “for legitimate concerns.

Most people spend so much time fearing the things that are never going to happen or can't be controlled that they have no energy to deal with the few things they can actually handle.

Worry is focus! But it is focus on the wrong things.

focus on what can be controlled. And you will no longer be sad or worried. You will be grateful! After all, the seeds of depression cannot take root in a grateful heart.

Wisdom can be gathered in your downtime. Wisdom that can change the very course of your life will come from the people you are around, the books you read, and the things you listen to or watch on radio or television.

“One of wisdom's greatest benefits,” Jones continued, “is accurate discernment — the learned ability to immediately tell right from wrong. Good from evil. Acceptable from unacceptable. Time well spent from time wasted. The right decision from the wrong decision. And many times this is simply a matter of having the correct perspective.

“One way to define wisdom is the ability to see, into the future, the consequences of your choices in the present

Somewhere along the line, there has to be something to share when the physical attraction is not on your mind twenty-four hours a day, because here's what happens: after three months or three years — sometime, you can be sure — the physical thing won't be the absolute, number-one, most important thing in that couple's life. There will be some other things that begin to be important too.

Your family, your true friends, they have been placed in your life for a reason. They can help you gain perspective on whatever situation you're in. They are a resource. Pay attention.

“Many of life's treasures remain hidden from us simply because we never search for them. Often we do not ask the proper questions that might lead us to the answer to all our challenges. We are so caught up in fear and regret, that hope seems a foolish endeavor. Proof of hope, however, is not only possible; it is an overlooked law of the universe.”

every one of us is always in a crisis, coming out of a crisis, or headed for a crisis.

“No matter your age, physical condition, financial situation, color, gender, emotional state, or belief … everything you do, every move you make, matters to all of us — and forever.”

Despite popular belief to the contrary, there is absolutely no power in intention.

Have you ever considered how often we judge ourselves by our intentions while we judge others by their actions? Yet intention without action is an insult to those who expect the best from you.

“But know this: you have yet to deal with the consequences of some of your actions. It will not be an easy process. There are those who will doubt your motives and warn others away from you because of your past. But let me make you a promise: if you will only face these consequences honorably and generously, seeking forgiveness with a spirit of honest remorse, you will eventually win the hearts of even those who hate you.

“I believe you should ask yourself every day, ‘What is it about me that other people would change if they could?’ This is incredibly important introspection.