Me: Parrots masturbate. Keller: Nope. No. I’m out. Hayes: Wait. How do you even know this? Fox: ^ What he said Fox: Have you, like, SEEN it? Me: Don’t be fucking weird, Foxy. Me: I’m sitting at a bar, and I overheard this guy telling his buddies about his brother’s pet parrot who got attached to him and literally masturbated to death. Keller: That’s not possible.
