Savor It

by Tarah DeWitt

People can’t follow your rules if you don’t make them clear. This applies in all your relationships: parenting, love, and friendships alike. If you don’t tell people what is and isn’t okay with you, they have no way of knowing.

“Your laugh is … I don’t know what it is, Sage, but your laugh…” I feel the muscles in his back bunch beneath my hands, the ones in his stomach contracting and relaxing against mine. “I think your laugh could maybe defibrillate me.”

I realized that infatuation was the shortness of breath, the adrenaline, the idea that we could ever just be friends and it wouldn’t kill me each and every day. Love is this. Love is breathing. A sweet, deep, aching relief. And it’s somehow even more disorienting.

Just because you do everything right, even if you know you deserve it, doesn’t mean that it will all be perfect in the end. Just because you accomplish a dream doesn’t mean it’ll make you happy forever. Sometimes wonderful people get sick, and sometimes people who were terrible to you have everything go according to plan. It really is what you do with it, what you take with you when you go to bed at night that counts.

“It’s been a privilege to fall in love with you, Sage,” I tell her helplessly. Her expression shatters, and I kiss the tears from her cheeks before I have to wrench myself away.

Life’s short. Go to the library. Live a million different stories and see a million different places in one. You might not have control over some things, but you can always foster your imagination.

Time will always give the best advice. Take care of your moments and the years will follow suit.