Running Close to the Wind

by Alexandra Rowland

“In the last two days, I have been through more than any silly little slut should ever have to go through!”

“This man’s skull is empty like a new bucket,” she had said, pointing right at him. “Write this down: He does not have a single thought in that pretty little head. There is nothing going on in there.”

“Look at this baby boy. Look at this little infant child.” “He’s extremely small,” Avra agreed. “I’m seventeen,” Ellat snapped. “Teeny baby, still wet,” Avra said.

“Words! Cheap words!” Avra said. “Buying a drab grey robe is also very cheap! Fake monk is a very affordable disguise!”

terrible idea that had ruined the ambiance of a perfectly good murder village.

Very ofmd coded dhdjdjdj

Blue Dog Island,

I wish I lived on Blue Dog Island

They’d said in the language classes at the academy that people counted on their fingers in different ways in different places, and then they’d reiterated that point when he’d joined Intelligence and they’d informed him that this was an important thing to remember if he ever ended up going undercover as a local.

Fdjskdjdjjs

Without taking their eyes off the dog, Teveri threw one piece of the rope at another piece of the rope and suddenly had a loop tied in it. Avra vaguely recognized that as the same spooky rope trick Markefa had once shown him.

The dog watched Teveri creep forward. It really was astonishingly blue. It was a little more than knee height at the shoulder, the size and configuration of a N’gakan lion-hunting dog—pointy snout, long legs, a deep chest, and fairly short fur everywhere but for the soft feathering on its ears and markedly curved tail. Its nose was black and wet and twitching; its eyes were bright and intelligent. And blue.

I want this dog!!!!!

“He’s not allowed to go on romantic walks in the doglight.

Except that perhaps two hundred yards off, there was an entire swarm of glowing blue dogs leaping and frolicking and dashing about madly, and even more of them clustered in a long double line around something on the sand.

Living on this beach would cure my depression

Lost Inventory: 1 dog (glowing) Added Inventory: 1 dog (glowing), 1 dog (not glowing)

“The most people that have ever been in bed with me at one time for the purposes of sexual activities? Or the most people I have gotten off in one evening?” “Both,” Avra said instantly. “Six and fifty-two, respectively.” Avra had to sit with that for … a long time. “That’s. That’s so many. Julian, that is so many.”

THAT’S SO MANY

Here, I’ll come up with a much more worthwhile line of scientific inquiry: If you were a jam, what jam would you be? Wait, no, let’s do each other’s instead. That’s more fun. If I were a jam, what jam would I be?” “Toe jam,” Teveri replied without missing a beat. Avra gestured up to them. “You see, Julian? Now that’s what we call science.”

“What do you mean they glow?” demanded Black Garda. “Means you don’t need a lamp when you go on walkies at night,” said Avra. “A major feature of these extremely good, extremely blue dogs. I’m sure you will agree.”

I keep having sexy thoughts of him snapping and making out with me, and then I break away and gasp, ‘But Julian! Your vows!’ and he says something like, ‘I don’t care about my vows, your short pants have tormented me long enough,’

“The theme we set them is, of course … the security breach at the Araşti Shipbuilder’s Guild in Kasaba City earlier this spring!”

Holy SHIT this is so fucking good

He was standing with his feet on solid deck and the wind at their backs, and the thing he most believed at this point in time, the thing he knew with a certainty down to his bones and beyond, down through all the turtles beneath, was that he was going to swallow Julian’s dick like a python.

he said curryfully.

I’ve seen Avra Helvaçi scuttle up a palm tree like a little rat that’s got something badly wrong with it,