If a mother feels insecure about her parenting, and sees another mother doing things differently, it would be reasonable to want to learn from the second mother. But that is not what happens. Instead, feelings of insecurity are transformed into a sense of self-righteousness. We go on the defensive: Our way becomes the right way. Other mothers are quick to tell you their way is the right way. Mothers feel defensive because the deck is stacked against us. We bear the brunt of parenting anxieties individually. No matter how involved a father is, it is the mother who is judged by her child’s
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