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Talking about leaving me. Bitch, I made you. I did. Me.
“What is life right now?”
Life itself was beating me without relief.
“When I said buy yourself something nice, I meant that. Don’t disobey me, Mommas. I hate that shit. If you need your rent paid, use that one.”
He’d seen enough of the broken me. He’d done enough for the damaged me. The best thing I could do for us both was allow him to leave and go on with his life while I began picking up the pieces of mine.
“Enjoy your freedom, Mommas. You won’t be free for long.”
“You with me, Mommas. There’s no safer, better place to be. I’ll stand on that, any time, any place.”
“I’m not detaching. I’m simply trying to establish a solid connection while making sense of the one that’s already in place.”
I loved him from the moment I saw his face. And my love happens to be unconditional. I’m not afraid of crashing for the right reason. He’s the right reason. I’ll crash a hundred times if he’s my end result.”
“You gon’ stand there letting your mouth water or you gon’ come suck this motherfucker?”
You can be a lot of shit when you’re around me, but scared ain’t one of ’em.”
“Put ya lips anywhere they ain’t supposed to be and I’m catching two cases, Kiwi.”
“I don’t give a fuck about that nigga, whoever he may be. Fuck him. He fucked up so I could come through.”
She was too damn pretty to sleep like the animal she wasn’t. That shit wouldn’t ever not be funny to me.
“Long time no see, Menace.” “My name is Makai, nigga.”
Wake up, big head ass girl.
“It’s cool because when it’s my turn to stare, I won’t give a fuck and I won’t stop until I’m good and ready.”
That’s up to you. I won’t ever stop giving it, but there will be times when you’re up in your feelings and won’t be willing to receive it.”
I ain’t asking you shit. I’m telling you what it is. You can either fall in line or fall in line. Because I’m reasonable, I gave you two options.”
“What’s the point of settling when you know there’s someone out there that checks every one of your boxes?”
“I need you to sit on this dick, Mommas. Your shit leaking.”
I could feel his gaze, carving holes in my chest to steal a heart that would be his, anyhow, when it was all said and done.
Makai’s peaking was as beautiful as his dark eyes and flawless skin.
“I have two eyes, Kiwi. I know exactly where we are. It doesn’t matter. Wherever we are and Mommas is feeling blue, that’s where the fuck we’ll be until she’s warm again.”
“Don’t thank me. I’m just doing what I’m supposed to do for my big, big baby.”
And she’s a good girl? Them my favorite kind. They take their asses to work and come straight to the house. They might watch a few shows, read hella books, and sleep as often as they can.” “Always tired as fuck.” “Exactly. I love a sleepyhead.” “She be knocked the fuck out. I just be up, bored as fuck, waiting on her to open her eyes.”
It was maddening, the way she had me seeing shit, hearing shit, and feeling shit that hadn’t even happened but was strongly desired.
“To tell you to pack a bag. I’m ready to lay down. I’m sleepy. I’ll be waiting in the tru—”
just asking you to put off whatever you on until tomorrow. I haven’t had more than three hours of sleep all week. I ain’t gon’ get none until I begin making things right with you. This is only a gesture. It’s not me saying fuck you or your feelings. I’m saying fuck that shit tonight.
I’m trying to have a permanent guest.”
I’d never known peace until Glacier. Now that I’d discovered it, I never wanted to live without it.
Though he’d never been in love before, he’d been loved and he’d been loved properly. It made all the difference.
He had a heart, a bigger one than any person I’d ever met in life. Though he didn’t open it to many, he’d opened it to me and I was grateful to have such a large chunk of him.
The people I love, I don’t let them down. I never have and I never will. I’d go to the ends of the earth for ’em, no questions asked. I feel the same about you, but the shit is a little different.
I’m scared but I’ve never been a pussy, though.”
“Bet. Don’t put shit down. We don’t pay notes, baby. We pay for the whole thang.
“Don’t do that shit, Mommas. It’s the only time you look ugly.”
“Any nigga that tries to come between us has to go. No exceptions.”
Mommas was the total package and a nigga would have to put me in the mud before I came up off her. When I laid down to take my final rest, I wanted to sleep well knowing that I had everlasting love, endless top, and a piece of the ocean lying right beside me each day.
Mommas looked like money. My money. The kind that couldn’t fold. Wouldn’t fold. And didn’t run out.
“Baby,” she whispered, beckoning for my attention. “You got it, boss. She just resembles someone I used to know. It’s all good.” “You don’t know her no more, then, my nigga. That’s all that matters here.”
Learn the rules and stick to them motherfuckers,”
There was no need for me to join his pity party. I wanted to turn that motherfucker up.
“Nel, Nelso, whatever your name is, my nigga, I just want to give thanks to you, my nigga, for doing whatever the fuck you did and blessing me with the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me. She’s one of a kind, bro. “What you’ve done on the block, any motherfucker could’ve. But what you’ve done for my life, nah. Niggas at this table ain’t fucking with that. Best gift ever, hands down, nigga. I appreciate that. I appreciate you. So, to Nelson.”
“She fucking the boss now, dog. When you see her in the streets, look the other way and we gon’ be aight. No hard feelings. It’s love, all love, ’cause you the nigga I have to thank for giving my baby up. That extra key on me.” I chuckled. “And that still ain’t enough ’cause I could never repay a nigga for fucking up that bad.”
“Never feel threatened by a nigga in my presence. I will kill everything breathing in this bitch about you. Don’t ever get that twisted. For you, I will clear a whole town. For you, I will lay shit down. For you, I will wage war. For you, G, hell ain’t even the limit. Fix your face, that’s your past. I’m your future.”
She sought security, comfort, and validation. I met her exactly where she was, willing to give her whatever she needed.
I’ma marry the shit out of that fucking girl.
You’re not fucking on a bum, Glacier. You’re fucking on a boss. Act accordingly. Head high, chest out in every room you walk in, no matter who is in that motherfucker.”
“Listen to me, Mommas,” he gritted, back on his knees and in front of me. “I’m your first line of defense. I’m your emergency line. I’m the motherfucker you call to handle your shit. I’m your fucking police. Me. Call me! Don’t call them. Call me! They’re going to put that nigga in the cold cell; I’m going to put that bitch in the soil. I’m sparing nothing and no one behind you. Do you understand me?”
