More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
Our butler, Nolan, walks inside, all dressed in his impeccable suit and the slightly crooked bow tie. “I’ve got this, Nolan. Thanks,” I tell him as I fetch eggs from the fridge. “Sir, that’s not it.” “Then what is it?” “You have a peculiar visitor.” “This early…?” I lift my head and I can hear the sound of my shattering heart as my eyes meet those deep-blue ones. Nikolai is in my parents' house.
How dare he be so unaffected when I’ve barely been able to breathe properly since he’s been gone?
I crunched more pills than I have in my entire life just to bring myself down from the high. So that I could see him without being weirded out about the fact that I could hurt him.
“Don’t ever do that again.” He pants against my lips, his fingers pulling on my hair until it’s painful. “Don’t you fucking dare walk away from me or ghost me. I don’t give a fuck if you’re on a high or a murder spree. I couldn’t care less if you hurt me. You don’t come to me when you’re only okay, you come to me at all times. Am I fucking understood?”
So imagine my fucking surprise when he threads his fingers through mine and smiles at his parents. “Yeah, Mum. This is Nikolai and he’s more than just a friend.”
He’s in love with him. It’s not a crush, mere admiration, or a fling. My son is fully, truly, and irrevocably in love with the gangster. God rest my soul in fucking pieces.
“I don’t want to hide you, Nikolai. I also told Glyn and my friends about us.”
“So we’re going public now? Actually, no question mark, we’re definitely going public. I need everyone to know you’re fucking mine.”
I smile, but it falters when I reach his pectoral muscle and find a new tattoo in the spot he left blank on purpose. My hands freeze as I study the artistic patterns of the lotus flower and make out the elegant font beneath it that reads Property of B. King. He had it inked on the spot that he said was for something special.
“Because this means I love the fucking shit out of you, baby. I can’t live without you and you’re not allowed to leave me.”
He’ll leave you when he knows what you’ve done. Everyone else will see you as the weakling you are.
“Absolutely, and, baby?” He kisses the top of my head and his next words nearly give me a heart attack. “Even if you hate yourself, I’ll love you for the both of us.”
“Nikolai Sokolov.” He mock gasps, pretending to be offended. “Are you only using me for sex?” “Says the guy who woke me up with his lips around my cock at five in the fucking morning.”
He kisses me like he will never let go of me. Like he’ll burn for me as hot as I burn for him. I want this moment to last forever, please and fucking thank you.
Astrid will definitely miss me, as she told me this morning. We formed a bond, and I’m telling you, that amazing woman will be my mother-in-law one day. My future father-in-law, however, likes to play hard to get. Now I know where his son got the trait from. But I think even his grumpy self will miss me.
And here I am standing at Death’s door, begging him not to take away my Bran.
A hand lands on my shoulder and I whip around to find Landon staring at me with harsh eyes. “Whatever you’re doing, I want in.”
My father, Kyle Hunter, the most elite sniper you’ll ever encounter, feeds my tendencies in the healthiest ways possible.
“This is for putting your hands on him and driving him to the fucking edge. You better wait for me in hell, bitch. I’ll fucking murder you all over again.”
“Brandon, son.” Dad sits beside Mum and they both grip my hand tight. “This family can’t exist without you, you understand?” “I don’t want it without you,” Mum says on a sob.
I thought you’d find me weak and revolting. The idea of you seeing me differently haunts me, Nikolai. I don’t want to lose you.” “But you’re okay with me losing you? I’m a shell without you, Bran.”
“This thing only beats for you and because of you. I used to live an aimless life where adrenaline was my god, but you came along and tamed my demons. You balance me. You complete me. You’re fucking in me. So seeing you bleeding out on the floor was no different than watching myself die. No, it was worse. I’ve never felt so scared for my life, but you…you’re my everything. How could you do that to me? To us?”
“Hey, Niko?” “Hmm?” “Remember when we met that little girl in the park and you asked me what I whispered back to her?” “You said it was a secret,” he grumbles. “I told her I don’t need help because I’m in love with you.”
“Remember when you told me to tell you something in Russian?” “You said I was cute.” “No. I said ‘I can’t live without you,’ and we take that quite literally in Russia.” “Aw, Nikolai.” “Point is, I love the loving fuck out of you, baby.” “I love the loving fuck out of you, too.”
Never giving that painting up. Will probably have to put a request in my will to bury it with me so that when I meet Satan, I can tell him all about my lotus flower.
