“Portaled out through the men’s room—super classy. Said he couldn’t wait—he had somewhere more important to be than, and I quote, Hallmark Halloween Central. So I told him to go fuck himself, to which he said, ‘Or what?’ And I said, ‘or I’ll dip you in wax and light your dick like a birthday candle.’” I roll my eyes. “Who hurt you, Olivy? Goodness, the threats. Honestly.” “Your friend didn’t take it as a threat. He asked me to marry him, actually.” She laughs. “Sick fuck.” “Yes, that’s definitely Finn. So when’s the big day?”
