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In a weird way, that’s why I helped Aoife Molloy all those months ago. I would have helped her anyway, but the utter helplessness I saw in her eyes that night as she stared down the gun of love and pain, I knew there was something in her that I could relate to. I knew what it felt like to be that helpless, and I never wanted anyone to experience it. I saw the look in her eyes. I knew that look.
I never forgot the spark. The ping. The ignited buzz that throttled my chest and caused my skin to grow hot and cold and warm and tingly all at once. It had only happened one time with one girl. She did something to me that day,
I knew her favorite song every year since August 7, 1989. I knew her secrets, her little habits, and traits that nobody else noticed. I wanted to waste my time on her. All of my time. All of the time.
“Just try to get rid of me.” Chuckling, he stood up from the sand in one swift move, taking my bestie with him. “I’ve got you, my little darling.” “And I’ve got you, Binding 13,” she cooed, attempting and failing to ruffle his hair. “So pretty.”
Even when we were little, and even though he despised it, he would humor me by playing Barbies with me. Sure, he would bring along his action figures and cause as much destruction as possible to my Barbie house, but he still played with me.
She was so fucking beautiful that it made my chest ache. Honest to God, looking at this girl for too long caused a physical ache to develop in my rib cage.
I guess that’s what true love was, though. It wasn’t perfect. It didn’t come in the perfect gift-wrapped box. It was messy and raw and pushed you to your absolute limits.
“Whatever Shan can give me,” Johnny replied, ignoring the appalled look on my face. “I’ll take whatever she’s willing to give me.” He frowned again, thinking hard about something before saying, “You know, I think I’d love a daughter.” He scratched his jaw as he spoke. “I’d be delighted with sons, too, of course, but I’d love to raise a little girl with Shan.” Shrugging, he added, “You know, show her how different it should’ve been for her.”
“No one. We’re not fighting anyone,” Johnny was quick to rebuff. “Because I am in contract. You are on a warning,” he added, pointing at me before turning his attention to Joey. “And you are on probation.”
Ignoring Johnny’s words of warning, Joey looked to me and repeated, “Who are we fighting, Gussie?”
“Although, if you really want to thank me, you could always make me AJ’s godfather.” His lips twitched in response. “Don’t push it.”
“Because I love you too much!” he surprised me by saying. Expelling a pained breath, he dropped his head to rest on my shoulder. “Because I fucking love you, Claire Biggs.”
“Now, the first thing we’re going to work on is this phobia of blood.” Smirking, he nudged my shoulder with his. “Because I’ve a feeling there’s an unmerciful beast of a flanker inside you just waiting to come out…”
My best friend’s familiar voice filled my ears, and I whipped around to find him standing in the middle of my bedroom with his hands in the air. “Johnny?” “The one and only.” His tone was soft, coaxing, and laced with approval. “See? I knew you could hear me, fucker.”
“Can everyone just clear out for a few minutes,” I heard my best friend command, chasing all the voices away. “Gibs and I are having a bit of a moment here, and we don’t need ye bunch of bleeding babies crying around the place, now do we, Gibs?”
you’re my Gibs.” “And you’re my Kav.”