The Unfinished Revolution: How a New Generation is Reshaping Family, Work, and Gender in America

by Kathleen Gerson

Rather than feeling deprived of a “normal” home, they felt fortunate to receive care and attention from people who loved them genuinely and generously. Since contemporary nuclear families increasingly experience unpredictable (and unavoidable) economic and caretaking squeezes, they are not—and cannot be—self-sufficient entities. When all goes well for families, the wider supports on which they depend may be invisible; but when families encounter economic, practical, and interpersonal difficulties, the crucial contributions from those who dwell just outside this small circle become more apparent. The children who experienced improving family pathways treasured the help given by real and fictive extended kin. It made little difference if care came from grandparents, other relatives, or paid helpers. What mattered is that these “villages” cushioned the blows of unexpected change, provided children with a sense of stability in uncertain times, and helped families overcome the crises parents could not resolve on their own.19