every day, I woke up and lied to the one person I wasn’t to keep secrets from. It was bearable when our relationship was platonic, but the shift that had come over me since we became more was like night and day. I felt so tired all the time, like I was carrying this massive weight around that was becoming more unbearable with every day that passed. It wasn’t until the morning of the winter ball that I finally came to the conclusion that I couldn’t do this anymore. I couldn’t carry this weight another day. It was too much. It was too crippling.
