I have only been able to go back into What Happened, and with it the active threat of annihilation and being swallowed up, because such things as Scripture, prayer, friends, therapy, time, and writing have secured for me a surefootedness and generosity with What Happened that was not available to me when it was my shrieking and vivid present tense. I’ve only been able to go into the Past with the understanding that Mercy has been offered. I have only been able to go back into What Happened with the patient, quiet understanding of who Christ is and who I am, where I’m going and what I’m
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