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And who are the Puck Sluts? Us, obviously.
His wife, Olivia, is a champ when it comes to drinking, even though she’s barely the size of the pup cup I get at Starbucks for my dog.
“Save yourself, Pig!” I shriek, chucking her leash and shoving her behind a bush. I cover my face and brace for impact. “I’m too young to die!”
“I accept apologies in the form of ice cream or iced lattes; I’m not picky.”
I half contemplate faking a broken bone, because taking me home to check me out? Sign me the fuck up.
“Pig!” I snicker, rocking forward. “At least take him to dinner first!”
Holy forkballs,
“Don’t poke the bear. Adam’s gone grizzly mode.”
“One might think you’re stalking me.” “That’s what I said! My friend said girls like that stuff, though.”
I need help. Maybe professional. I need to call a meeting. I need a motherfucking girls’ night.
Cara changed the group chat name to Journey to Pussy Palace.
“Hidden…identity…” She underlines it three times. “I love this trope.”
Nothing worth having ever comes easy, does it? We want the calm, but sometimes we have to brave the storm to get there.”
“You did your research.” “I love research.” His brows pinch with his frown. “That was so lame.”
Wanna ride in Adam’s truck?” Cause Mama wants to ride something else of Adam’s. No. Fuck. No, Rosie. Think with your brain, not with your tits. Think with your brain, not with your tits. Think with your brain, not with your tits.
“My peen hero.”
“Your future and your destiny aren’t the same thing. Your future is anything that’s going to happen, the things we can’t pick. But your destiny…it’s everything that’s meant for you. The things we work hard for every day, because we want them. Maybe part of your destiny is a future where you aren’t afraid to wade through the deeper parts of the creek in the mountain, to swim with your son without fear, to be able to say good-bye to him every morning without that fear that it might be permanent. But those things don’t come easily, do they?”
My phone’s buzzing on my kitchen counter, my favorite group of Puck Sluts checking in.
I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve wondered why loving ourselves is one of the hardest things we’ll ever do.
Because, I think, self-love is as simple as giving myself grace on the hard days, loving myself extra when I need it.
“I like you as a gentleman, but I love when you lose a little composure.”
“Rosie! What does baby free mean?”
“Does she ever, you know…not?” He shakes his head wistfully. “Never. Never does she not. She always does.”
I’m sorry Brandon is a useless twat-waffle.”
“What’s a twat-waffle?”
“We’ll never be right for everyone, but we’ll be perfect for the right person. And when that person comes along, there is no choice. It just…is. We exist exactly the way we are, with exactly the right people, because there is no other way to be.”
“I don’t want this to go to your head, but it feels like I’m being politely split in half.”
“You’re not my first choice, Rosie. You’re the only goddamn option.”
I got dicked so hard I feel it in my brain.
Love is, without a doubt, the most certain emotion I’ve ever felt. It’s steady and sure, constant, like the gentle ripple of the creek winding through the mountains, the quiet song from the birds in the treetops.
“Families are built on honesty. Hard truths and scary vulnerabilities.
“You’d be surprised, but years of fuckboy behavior have taught me that when a woman says she’s fine, she’s never fucking fine.”
“You were never his dirty secret, Rosie. You’re his world, and I’m pretty sure it’s stopped spinning since you’ve been gone.”
And I feel happy when I’m with you. Feels a little like my heart is smiling.”
“You’re so annoying sometimes, you fuckin’ turkey.”
Think with your brain, not with your tits. Think with your brain, not with your tits.
“I’m gonna marry you someday, after all. Batman always gets the girl.”
knew he was a Puck Slut from the moment he stepped off that plane from Nashville a year ago.”
“Emmett, get Cara on the phone. I need her advice.” He leaps from his seat, dashing across the room to grab his phone. “She’s been preparing for this her entire life.”
“Garrett, you donkey.” Jennie glares at him, fists on her hips. “You stole my entrance!”
“You can’t tell me that’s not some soul-mate shit,” Garrett says. “Panties matching her ring?”
“Excuse. The fuck. Out. Of me.”
I dipped my dick in the snow to compare sizes. Honestly, I don’t want to talk about it.
You didn’t throw my whole world off balance. You centered it. It was like you were my gravity, and every moment I was with you, everything settled into place.
“With you, I found my gravity. That’s worth so much more than my chaos.”
