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“what if I jumped? What if I oopsie-daisied myself into oblivion without a second of introspection? What if I simply gave in to the cold part of my mind?”
A book I read once described a depressive episode as “it feels like practice.” And it does. Everything feels like it doesn’t matter very much.
“‘Leaves hellbent on hitting the earth, beautiful and suicidal, their destination resolute. I hope I find that. I hope I have the guidance of my individual gravity.’”
“I’m—” she chokes out, convulsing against me. “Oh, God, I’m going to—“ “Damn right you are.” Monsters, indeed.
I’m not a naïve girl to be toyed with; I’m a caged monster lost in all of time and space who has finally gotten the strength to break free.

