More on this book
Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Estelle Rose
The fear of missing out, of being exposed as the eternal oddity, tugged at my heartstrings.
The chaos in your life, the housework, organizing, especially when you have to manage the lives of those around you as well (like, you know, kids), can feel so overwhelming, and it's hard not to feel like you're drowning in a sea of responsibility.
Just remember that ADHD doesn't have to hold you back. You are so much more than your diagnosis, and with the right tools and support, you can learn to manage the overwhelm, calm your mind, make peace with your brain, and achieve your goals in both work and relationships.
ADHD, also known as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, is a neurological condition affecting both children and adults. Think of it as having a noisy brain that can't sit still, like a super excited puppy that just wants to jump and run around all the time (and sometimes chase its own tail).
Some of the most common sidekicks (err, comorbidities) of ADHD include learning disorders (dyslexia, dyscalculia, etc.), anxiety, depression, sensory processing disorder, and oppositional defiant disorder. It's like playing a giant game of Tetris in our heads, and the pieces don't even fit.
It's important to remember that the “good girl” narrative is just that - a narrative. It's not based on fact or science. And it certainly doesn't mean that girls can't have ADHD.
Additionally, women may develop coping mechanisms, such as perfectionism and people-pleasing, that can mask their ADHD symptoms.
We have an innate ability to connect and build meaningful relationships with our unfiltered thoughts and lively personality. Sure, comorbidities such as anxieties can get in the way, but broadly speaking, our hyperactive and impulsive nature can make us the life of the party.
Even better, we tend to be sensitive to others' emotions, which makes us great at understanding people and building relationships based on mutual understanding and support.
While some may see ADHD as a deficit, I see it as an asset when it comes to connecting with others. We don't simply talk at people - our tendency to be highly attuned to the emotions of those around us makes us excellent empathizers. We often pick up on other people's feelings and needs without even trying, sometimes even a bit too much.
But it's not just empathy that we're great at - generosity is also a hallmark of ADHD. When we're interested in something or someone, we tend to throw our whole selves into it. That can mean giving generously of our time, resources, and energy. We sure know how to make a difference in the lives of those around us!
We might overshare, but we are great listeners too.
Our compassion and empathy also give us a powerful sense of what's fair and what's not, and we're not afraid to speak up when we see an injustice.
we can be great advocates for marginalized or oppressed people.
Our sense of humor is often a coping mechanism when things get tough to help us deal with stress and anxiety.
When we fall in love, we fall hard and will do anything to make our partner feel loved and appreciated.
but there are some things we should avoid. Processed foods and sugar are at the top of the list.
Artificial sweeteners can disrupt dopamine production. MSG has been linked to anxiety and depression, but that’s been contested. Artificial food colors as we’ve just discussed are all the E numbers, E104, E122, E124, E131, E142 in the E.U and the UK. And they’re called FD&C followed by a number in the U.S.
Sugar can interfere with the production of serotonin. It's another transmitter that helps with mood regulation. So when we eat sugar, we experience a temporary boost in mood but crash harder later. It can lead to symptoms already often present alongside ADHD, like anxiety, depression, fatigue, and irritability.
Protein is a godsend for our brain function and regulation. Why? Because it is needed to produce the neurotransmitters we want.
Ashwagandha is part of ancient Ayurvedic medicine and is known as "Indian Ginseng." This herb is all about balance and harmony. It is best known for relieving stress and giving you an energy boost. It also supports cognitive functions like focus and memory.
Ginkgo Biloba: It can help boost blood flow and oxygen to our brain. The result? It can help with focus, make sure we can think clearly, and stay sharp.
Yoga has been shown to increase levels of GABA, a neurotransmitter that helps regulate anxiety and stress. It can also increase gray matter in the brain, which is associated with improved cognitive function and memory.
NEAT stands for Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis, a fancy way of saying "the energy you use doing stuff that isn't exercise."
breath in for four seconds hold your breath for four seconds exhale for four seconds hold your breath for four seconds again.
breathing in for four seconds holding your breath for seven seconds exhaling for eight seconds
Taking a deep breath in through your nose Exhaling forcefully while sticking out your tongue and making a "ha" sound. It may look a bit silly, but this technique can help release tension in your face and throat
With RSD, every sideways glance or innocent comment becomes a personal attack, sending your emotions into a whirlwind. It's like wearing a magnifying glass over your heart, amplifying every perceived slight.
So unplug, mute that chat, don't check that email, excuse yourself from the conversation, whatever it takes. Then take a walk, find a quiet space, have a sensory break, or practice breathing exercises. And just let it cool down.
Remember, you are not your emotions. Try this affirmation: "This is one isolated moment, not my entire life."
You could consider supplements like ginseng, St. John's Wort, black cohosh, and Ginkgo but check with your doctor first.
What exactly is impostor syndrome? Well, it's the feeling of inadequacy or self-doubt despite evidence of success or competence. People with impostor syndrome often feel like a fraud and fear being exposed as such.
It's important to remember that not everyone will agree with or like you, and that's okay.
Just remember that setting boundaries is simply a way to gently communicate our needs, express our limits, and kindly assert ourselves when necessary. Friendships should be a harmonious dance, not a never-ending tug-of-war.
