The Stars are on Our Side

by Jennifer Hartmann

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” Confucius

The thing is, hope can be a savior, or it can be an executioner.

My trauma isn’t my life. It’s nothing but an awful piece wedged between a million beautiful pieces.

Life is too short to waste precious time on people who don’t appreciate and value you—family or not.

Don’t look down. I don’t look down, but I do allow myself to look back, because I know, undoubtedly, that looking back is the only way to keep moving forward.

“I’ve got you,” he murmurs. “You’re safe.” I suck in a shallow breath. “I’m t-trying to fly, but…” “I’ll be your wings,” he says, smoothing back my hair, his chin pressed to the top of my head. “You don’t have to save yourself this time. You’re not alone anymore.”

I’ll take every claw mark, every painful laceration, just for the chance to fly with her one day.

But I can’t forget. The only way out is through.

“I think, sometimes, the things that frighten us become more bearable when you don’t have to face them alone,”

My tears don’t care about reason or logic. They only know how to fall when I fall.

“The when doesn’t matter, Tabitha. The amount of time it takes to pull yourself up on shaky legs is irrelevant,” she whispers. “One day, you just start walking. And you don’t look back.”

“I’d give up all my basic needs for one single moment free from these chains. I’d sacrifice them in exchange for wrapping my arms around you and holding you tight.”

Birds start small. They hatch, and they grow, and they flap their wings until those wings are strong enough to fly. It’s instinct. It happens when their wings are ready. They never doubt that they will fly one day. They just know.

“With you in the world, how can there be anyone else?”

I’m here with you, bringing you a little bit of joy and happiness when you could be entirely alone. Maybe that’s my purpose. Maybe I was always meant to be here, to give you the strength to make it out of this alive.”

It’s funny how quickly the weather can change. But I know, deep down, that rain doesn’t last forever.

Life is so beautifully fragile.

“I don’t want someone who kills for me. I don’t want someone who dies for me.” Swallowing the emotion, she raises both palms and clasps my face. “I just want someone who will live for me.”

It brings me hope that, perhaps, in some way, the stars are more than just stars, and that maybe, maybe…those stars really are on our side.

“Just goes to show you that people are always changing, always growing. Who we are at one point in time isn’t necessarily who we’ll always be. It’s just a starting point, and it’s up to us to pick a direction.”