The Quiet Damage: QAnon and the Destruction of the American Family

by Jesselyn Cook

In 2021, a staggering 15 percent of Americans agreed that the government, media, and financial worlds were “controlled by Satan-worshipping pedophiles,” polling found. By late 2023, that number had rocketed to 25 percent.

Researchers would later find a positive correlation between conspiracy theory belief and depression—most prevalent, interestingly, among the relatively privileged: white people, high-income earners, and those with college educations.

Social isolation and loneliness, as well, were known to fuel hypervigilance toward perceived threats, in addition to cognitive decline.

Narcissism was one of very few personality traits that was a robust predictor of conspiracy theory thinking.

They were consuming and disseminating information with relatively limited skepticism—in fact, they were four times more likely than “digital natives” to share fake news.

A third of “digital immigrants” over sixty-five believed that the news articles in their Facebook feeds were selected by a group of company employees, just as a team of editors would decide which stories to put in the Times.

In times of unrest and uncertainty throughout history, people have turned to conspiracy theories—some valid, many not—to make sense of what was happening.

Inside the QAnon labyrinth, opposition was celebrated as validation.

Their appeal, in turn, generally hinged upon their status as dissenters rather than the legitimacy of their dissent, while their professional reprimands, malpractice complaints, and fact-checked Facebook posts were touted as badges of honor.

The timing couldn’t have been better: QAnon’s messaging hit home inside quarantined households nationwide as the already-disproportionate burden of caregiving on women dramatically increased.

And when people’s firmly held beliefs are challenged—particularly those tied to their sense of self—the brain reacts the same way it would to a physical threat, ready to defend those beliefs as if they were part of the body. Adrenaline courses through the bloodstream, the heart races, and the prefrontal cortex, the brain’s logic center, is functionally compromised. It can make people impulsive and irrational. Cruel, even.

Research suggests that harboring grievances—whether they stem from real or perceived offenses—actually makes people feel good. Brain-imaging studies have revealed that feeling aggrieved, and in turn, desiring retribution, stimulates the same neural reward-processing circuitry as narcotics.

It came with a sense of belonging and value, which was no small thing in a society quick to dismiss seniors as a burden or simply ignore them.

Religious belief was significantly positively correlated with conspiracy theory belief, attributed by experts to the service of common psychological needs (certainty, purpose, community) and shared underlying elements (grand narratives, a righteous mission, conviction in the unseen).

“With this QAnon stuff…Why do you care? And is it worth it?”

What emotions were appropriate upon privately declaring one’s own parent symbolically deceased?

The biggest person in his life was no longer there, yet there would be no funeral, no condolences, and no bereavement leave—no transition period or acknowledgment of any kind. Just him and his unspoken sorrow.

“Even if you weren’t personally racist, sexist, etc. you enabled the people that [were] by subscribing to these views.”

Matt blinked back tears as it dawned on him that his fondest memories from the past couple years were limited to holidays: the rare occasions when he had stepped away from his conspiracy theory content in the basement to spend time with his family.

omfg…

It was becoming embarrassingly, disturbingly clear to him that his beliefs had been rooted simply in a desire to believe.