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In fact, self-reliance was the most dangerous of all attitudes. Thus learning to trust yourself will be a new journey.
The point is you are human. You try to do the best you can; no one deliberately plans to create unhappiness.
As John Bradshaw (1990) a leading writer in the field of recovery, explains, “Every child needs desperately to know that a) his parents are healthy and able to take care of him, and b) that he matters to his parents.”
This dependence is why children will sustain their loyalty to parents despite abuse.
To believe that one’s group is right and must be defended provides or has provided human beings with one of their most effective defenses against the depredations of nature and of other human beings.
Irving Yalom (1980), psychiatrist and existential humanist, describes four core human dilemmas: death, responsibility, isolation, and meaning. Christian fundamentalism appears to resolve each very neatly, eliminating ambiguity and satisfying a natural, human desire for safety.
Being “saved” is a reprieve from confronting one’s mortality, which includes aging, disease, and vulnerability.
Fundamentalist Christianity also promises daily protection from “sin and Satan.” The world is considered dangerous with evil rampant. Life is seen as a battle and a struggle.
Intellectual ambiguity can be very uncomfortable. It is always easier to be sure of something. A religion that neatly provides all the answers saves you the frustration and anxiety that inevitably accompany a struggle with difficult questions.
if you leave the belief system, you lose your acceptance.
It turned out that power was by far the dominant subject,
the second most frequent theme was safety.)
tremendous and continuous battle going on between good and evil.
They are considered stronger than ordinary human strength. Therefore the help of God is always necessary. God and Satan are perceived to be constantly fighting over the souls of human beings.
Rather than fostering a spirit of mutual help and cooperation, this religion seems to evoke the most basic survival instincts and aggressions.
In fundamentalism, there is no understanding of character development, only miraculous transformation due to God’s grace. Rather than attending to the process of self-awareness and personal growth, you simply channel the Holy Spirit in your life. Being happy and being a good person are due to the power of God — an appealing shortcut.
