When the Body Says No

by Gabor Maté

Women who were more self-regulated, less emotionally dependent on a relationship that failed to work for them, had stronger immune systems.

Whatever undermines autonomy will be experienced as a source of stress.

The less the emotional capacity for self-regulation develops during infancy and childhood, the more the adult depends on relationships to maintain homeostasis.

If I chronically repress my emotional needs in order to make myself “acceptable” to other people, I increase my risks of having to pay the price in the form of illness.

one learns love not by instruction, but by being loved.”