It's Not Summer Without You (Summer, #2)

by Jenny Han

But even more than that, my mother was at her best when she was busy, doing things. She did not fall apart, not when she was needed. No, my mother rose to the occasion. I wished that was a gene I’d inherited. Because I was at a loss.

There are moments in life that you wish with all your heart you could take back. Like, just erase from existence. Like, if you could, you’d erase yourself right out of existence too, just to make that moment not exist.

Seeing her like that, like an actual person and not just my mother, it almost made me not trust her.

But I didn’t regret it. I never regretted it, not for one second. How do you regret one of the best nights of your entire life? You don’t. You remember every word, every look. Even when it hurts, you still remember.

I wanted to memorize it all in case I didn’t get to come back again. You never know the last time you’ll see a place. A person.

Happiness is a Slurpee and a hot pink straw.

It wasn’t the thought that counted. It was the actual execution that mattered, the showing up for somebody. The intent behind it wasn’t enough. Not for me. Not anymore. It wasn’t enough to know that deep down, he loved me. You had to actually say it to somebody, show them that you cared. And he just didn’t. Not enough.

I release you. I evict you from my heart. Because if I don’t do it now, I never will.