Of course, she got a lot of payoffs from her disappointing relationship history. She got to experience self-pity, resentment, jealousy, envy, and all those gratifications that the small self feeds on endlessly. If we look at the small part of ourselves, we will see that this is the kind of thing in which it just loves to wallow. The small self glorifies in how miserable life is, how tough luck is, how rotten our experiences have been and how mean people have been to us.
