Solving Tough Problems: An Open Way of Talking, Listening, and Creating New Realities

by Adam Kahane

When people walked by the speakerphones, they gave them a wide berth, afraid to get too close. Some of the participants were frightened of retribution for what they might say to the guerrillas. When I mentioned this fear, one of the guerrillas replied, “Mr. Kahane, why are you surprised that people in the room are frightened? The whole country is frightened.” Then the guerrillas promised they would not kill anyone for anything said in the meetings. Once the threat of force had been removed, the team was able to agree to a set of ground rules for their conversations. They agreed to “call things by their name”; to express their differences without irony; to assume the good faith of others; to be tolerant, disciplined, and punctual; to be concrete and concise; and to keep confidences.