Dreadful

by Caitlin Rozakis

So, this was shock. It seemed terribly inconvenient that the brain’s reaction to being placed in mortal jeopardy was to become much stupider.

If he was going to fail at “ominous,” though, it might have been nice to at least achieve “picturesque.” Maybe he could terrorize them into a beautification project.

“You seem to have an odd relationship with your goblins.” He shrugged. “It’s hard to hire good help.” “When you keep setting them on fire?” “Perhaps I should reconsider some of my employment policies,” he admitted.

He knew immediately that this had been a truly terrible idea. An idea on par, perhaps, with stripping naked, covering himself with honey, and politely requesting a bear to fight him. Preferably while drunk, and declaiming insults about the bear’s mother. Who had probably been a perfectly charming lady of the ursine persuasion.