The Peacemaker

by Ken Sande

our instinctive reaction is to justify ourselves and do everything we can to get our way. This selfish attitude usually leads to impulsive decisions that only make matters worse.

Focusing on God is the key to resolving conflict constructively.

ask God to help you resist the natural inclination to escape or attack when faced with conflict.

ask him to help you develop the ability to live out the gospel by using the peacemaking response that is best suited to resolving a particular conflict.

All different ways to think differently about trying to stay peaceful and not being a bother to anyone else and dealing with in internally. Things can go down the slope from denial to flight to suicide quickly or slowly. You never know where someone is on the scale and it is important to know and remember to seek the Lord especially when someone close or yourself is trying to identify the correct path to go down and staying in the middle of the scale

escape responses. People tend to use these responses when they are more interested in avoiding a conflict than in resolving it.

Attack

This is an unbiblical way to carry out the solving of conflict. We are to not make things worse as we are to be unified under Christ. Such ways can cause a rift and distance within in the body and not allow the body to be unified as scriptures tell us to be.

attack responses. These responses are used by people who are more interested in winning a conflict than in preserving a relationship.

responses are commanded by God, empowered by the gospel, and directed toward finding just and mutually agreeable solutions to conflict.

Overlooking an offense is a form of forgiveness and involves a deliberate decision not to talk about it, dwell on it, or let it grow into pent-up bitterness or anger.

too serious to overlook or has damaged the relationship, we need to resolve personal or relational issues through confession, loving correction, and forgiveness.

two people cannot reach an agreement in private, they should ask one or more objective outside people to meet with them to help them communicate more effectively and explore possible solutions.

you and an opponent cannot come to a voluntary agreement on a material issue, you may appoint one or more arbitrators to listen to your arguments and render a binding decision to settle the issue.

a person who professes to be a Christian refuses to be reconciled and do what is right,

Both extremes of the spectrum result in death, either through suicide or murder,

When I resort to an escape response, I am generally focusing on “me.” I am looking for what is easy, convenient, or nonthreatening for myself.

When I use an attack response, I am generally focusing on “you,” blaming you and expecting you to give in and solve the problem.

People who use escape responses are usually intent on “peace-faking,” or making things look good even when they are not.

Attack responses are used by people who are prone to “peace-breaking.”

conflict as a difference in opinion or purpose that frustrates someone’s goals or desires.

Many of these differences are not inherently right or wrong; they are simply the result of God-given diversity and personal

Bible teaches that we should see conflict neither as an inconvenience nor as an occasion to force our will on others, but rather as an opportunity to demonstrate the love and power of God in our lives.

Every conflict is a way to glourfy God and show the transformation he does and iur lives and be a light in these moments. Trust , obey, imitate, acknowledge These things give gospel sharing opportunities in all ways

The best way to glorify God in the midst of conflict is to depend on and draw attention to his grace, that is, the undeserved love, mercy, forgiveness, strength, and wisdom he gives to us through Jesus Christ.

trust God.

he is using the pressures of conflict to help you to grow, and cooperate with him.

trust the Lord in these “unnatural” ways, people will have the opportunity to see that God is real and praise him for his work

obey God.

repetition makes a life-changing point: If you want to honor Jesus and show that he is worthy to be loved more than anything in the world, learn his ways and obey his commands.

imitate God.

imitating Jesus in the midst of conflict is the surest path to restoring peace and unity with those who oppose us

acknowledge God.

these special opportunities to breathe grace to other people by telling them that it is God who has been working in you to do things you could never do on your own

Every time you encounter a conflict, you will inevitably show what you really think of God.

Many disputes begin or grow worse because one or both sides give in to their emotions and say or do things they later regret.

Whenever you are in conflict, there will often be many more people watching you than you realize. If you succumb to sinful emotions and lash out at your enemies, others will feel justified in doing the same. But if you respond to those who wrong you with love and self-control, many people could be inspired by your example

God may also use conflict to expose sinful attitudes and habits in your life. Conflict is especially effective in breaking down appearances and revealing stubborn pride, a bitter and unforgiving heart, or a critical tongue.

“ABC of spiritual growth”: Adversity Builds Character.

The concept of stewardship is especially relevant to peacemaking. Whenever you are involved in a conflict, God has given you a management opportunity.

Conflict provides opportunities to glorify God, to serve others, and to grow to be like Christ.

Peace is part of God’s character,

Peace is one of the great blessings that God gives to those who follow him

God repeatedly commands his people to seek and pursue peace

God describes his covenant with his people in terms of peace

God taught his people to use the word peace

see, it is impossible to know genuine internal peace unless you also pursue peace with God and others.

words, internal peace is a by-product of righteousness.

others. Internal peace comes only from being reconciled to God through his Son, receiving his righteousness and the power to resist sin, and then obeying what God commands.