Parents with boundaries that are too close and too leaky can burden their children with inappropriate information. A child exposed to adult problems thinks she’s supposed to have the maturity to handle them and worries that the parent needs more of her than she can give. Such children grow up feeling inadequate and too responsible. ABSORBENT MATES A person with boundaries set too close can be very vulnerable to her spouse’s mood changes. Like a sponge, she absorbs every frown, every tightened jaw, and feels responsible for it. She may take on responsibility that isn’t hers. She may do too much
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