The Complete Enneagram: 27 Paths to Greater Self-Knowledge

by Beatrice Chestnut

The path of growth for Type Fours calls for them to reclaim their ability to use self-evaluation, self-discipline, and structure as ways to support themselves rather than as ways of devaluing and punishing themselves. As children, Fours may have had to downplay their natural ability to use their ideals and follow the rules as a way of taking action to feel good about themselves and be productive in the world. In response to early loss or deprivation, Fours more typically took refuge in a flawed self-image and an experience of longing for what might have been, which can pull their focus away from working hard to prove their worth. The strategy of trying to be good as a way of earning approval may not have worked if they had to cope with an overwhelming sense of loss or deep feelings of deficiency. Fours tend to cope by attaching to a feeling of hopelessness or melancholy, to avoid being hopeful about things they believe might not happen. In doing this, they may have had to give up One attributes such as the active capacity to enact practical ideals and a belief in their ability to control what happens through hard work. They may not have been able to provide structure for themselves through routine and adherence to standards and rules because they had to focus on coping with a specific experience of loss or deprivation. Fours can consciously draw on the strengths of the One Point, using them to gain the support they need in their growth toward the Two Point, by taking actio...