Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace

by Heath Lambert

Whether you struggle with pornography yourself or are trying to help someone who struggles, I have good news for you: no matter how intense or long-standing the struggle, it is the work of Jesus Christ to set people free from such sin.

Paul moves from condemnation to confidence. First, sin is powerfully condemned. The words are clear: if you are sexually immoral you will not inherit the kingdom of God. All those who look at pornography have only a fearful expectation of condemnation. Thankfully, Paul does not end there. He moves toward confidence in our Redeemer, Jesus. Jesus cleanses sinners. Jesus loves to cleanse those who love to look at pornography, and he loves to give them power to change. Our sinfulness does not get the final word.

No matter how terrible pornography is, no matter how much trouble you are in, no matter how flimsy and weak your resources are, you are never in a pit so deep that the grace of Jesus cannot lift you out.

The issue is not whether a person is sad; instead, it is what they are sad about.

This kind of worldly sorrow leads to death. It is lethal because it flows from the same kind of heart that wanted to look at pornography in the first place.

You will not experience dramatic change in your struggle as long as you use accountability to describe your sins instead of declaring your need for help in the midst of temptation.

Many people struggle with pornography because it is so easy for them to get it. The simple truth is that if you keep pornography easily available, you will look at it sooner or later.

If a person wants purity, it is not enough to avoid having a physical, sexual relationship with someone who is not his or her spouse. If they want purity, Jesus says, they must not want sex with someone who is not their spouse.

Jesus raises the standard of purity from physical acts of fornication to lustful intentions of the heart and lustful looks of the eyes.

Why does Jesus urge such radical measures? Because of the life-and-death nature of the consequences. Employing radical measures is the path to life, while indulging sin is the path to hell. God does not forbid sexual immorality because he wants you to be miserable; God forbids it because sexual immorality leads to brokenness, sadness, emptiness, death, and hell.

If you want the life God offers, you will have to get serious about resisting your sin. You will have to be aggressive. You will have to get radical. Amputation is not easy. It is extraordinarily painful and carries with it a sense of loss, but the reward is far better than the alternative.

You will know you are finally free from pornography when you have full access to it and yet no desire for it.

If you only attack the outward behavior, the problem will keep returning. You must uproot pornographic lust in your thinking, dealing with what Jesus unveils as the lustful intentions of your heart (Matthew 5:28).

I can guarantee failure if you wait to begin the fight against porn until you are alone in the dark with your computer. This is a battle that must be waged the very moment you become aware of your desire to see pornography.

Repentance is an ongoing practice, and it happens most commonly in the fog of temptation.

The sinful logic of porn only works if you don’t think about it very hard.

That’s the warning God gives to us in his Word—even though you may not see the death and destruction that pornography brings today, they are certain to come. The worst kinds of penalties are those that are stored up over the longest time. Just because you aren’t experiencing them now doesn’t mean they’re not coming.

Thankfulness is the opposite of lust because the thankful heart has stopped prowling around for everything it doesn’t have and is overwhelmed with appreciation for all the good things it already possesses. The logic of lust requires you to be discontent with what you have and pay attention to all the things you don’t have. The logic of thankfulness requires you to focus on what you have already received and to be overcome with thanks. Gratitude is the opposite of greed.

Porn trades joy in the reality God has graced you with for greed in the counterfeit world he has not.

You have a wonderful and precious life given to you from the good hand of God himself. He has given things to you that he has given to no other person.

The battle to be free from porn is the battle to find a deeper joy.

Lust steals joy by creating an endless state of discontentment in the constant search for that one next thing you don’t have yet. Lust is never happy because lust is never full.

God will never demand something of you that he will not empower you to do by his grace.

If the only time you’re interested in walking with Jesus is when you want his help to get over porn, you’re not walking in the fullness of the loving relationship that Jesus wants to have with you.

You cannot look at Jesus and look at porn at the same time. You have to stop doing one to do the other. A living, breathing relationship with the Savior of the world will drive porn out of your life quicker than anything else. When you turn your eyes to Jesus, there isn’t room for anything else in your heart because he fills it up.

One of the main themes throughout this book is that we need the grace of Jesus in order to be like Jesus.