conditional or contingent self-esteem: it depends on circumstances. The greater the void within, the more urgent the drive to be noticed and to be “important,” and the more compulsive the need for status. By contrast, genuine self-esteem needs nothing from the outside. It doesn’t say, “I’m worthwhile because I’ve done this, that, or the other.” It says, “I’m worthwhile whether or not I’ve done this, that, or the other. I don’t need to be right or to wield power, to amass wealth or achievements.”
