We teach what we most need to learn—and sometimes give what we most need to receive. It was impossible to study addiction without observing myself closely, and I can say truthfully that I have learned much through this exercise. No matter how hard I try, I have found out that I may never fully defeat my addiction-prone tendencies. And I’ve also learned that this is all right. Triumph and defeat: these are still metaphors of war. If, as the research shows, addictions arise near our emotional core, to defeat them we would have to wage a war against ourselves. And a war against parts of the
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