I tell my three-year-old, “Don’t hit your sister. Go in your room and hit your dolly instead.” But she refuses and still goes for the baby. Should I continue using this approach? There’s a difference between sending a child away from you and instructing her to hit her doll, and inviting a child to express her feelings through the use of her doll as you watch. A more helpful statement would be, “I can’t let you hurt the baby, but you can show me what you’re feeling with your doll.” The key words are “show me.” As the child shakes her finger at the doll, or pummels it, the parent can give words
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