There are essentially three main choices we have regarding conflict. We can avoid it and deny that it exists, which, of course, will cause it to fester over time and drive a wedge into the relationship. We can also confront it, with our Judge and other Saboteurs leading the fight. We may get our way or negotiate a grudging compromise, but it will probably be at the cost of the relationship. The third way, the Sage’s way, is to embrace the conflict as a gift and harness its power to strengthen the relationship. If a couple or team tells me that their relationship is a 10 because they don’t have
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