Why Men Hate Going to Church

by David Murrow

LET MEN GATHER WITHOUT WOMEN AROUND One time I was coordinating a men’s service day at our church. The idea was to mobilize the men to prepare the building and grounds for an Alaska winter and to perform minor car repairs for people in need. The preparations were moving forward smoothly—until a woman named Nora approached me and said she felt discriminated against. Nora felt she had every right to serve alongside the men. She threatened to go to the elders and ask that the event be canceled if women were not allowed to volunteer. Did Nora have the right to participate? Absolutely. But I asked her to lay down that right, as a gift to the men. I pointed out that our church had a number of women-only opportunities, but this was the only men’s event of the year. Nora graciously gave up her crusade. The volunteer corps remained man-only and attracted a large crowd of guys, many of whom were the nonreligious husbands of churchgoing wives. I’m convinced the man-only designation helped swell our ranks, and it drew men on the fringe to serve.