Walk Like a Buddha: Even if Your Boss Sucks, Your Ex Is Torturing You, and You're Hungover Again

by Lodro Rinzler

Allow me to posit ten steps as a method for beginning your e-mail meditation training: 1. When you receive an e-mail, read the whole message first. Don’t leap into fixed mind, thinking you know what the other person is going to say. Take a fresh-start approach to this process and be thorough in your reading. Sometimes tone is hard to perceive in e-mail form, so take the time to read the whole thing, twice if needed. Let the words sink in. If there is feedback or news in the e-mail, notice what it brings up. Don’t start composing your response as you read the e-mail; just see what emotional and mental reactions come up. You don’t have to cling to those reactions. Relax with whatever arises. 2. Unless it’s something superspecific, such as “Can you remind me what time we’re meeting?” give it some space and time. If it is superspecific, then maybe you can go ahead and write a simple, straightforward answer. For example: If the e-mail is about something other than asking what time an event is going to happen or asking you to send over a document for review, don’t feel that you need to respond simply to get the e-mail out of your in-box. I’m as much a fan as getting to an empty in-box as anyone but not at the expense of sloppy communication. I employ a simple method for nonurgent e-mails that I know will require some thought: I sort them into a specific folder entitled Open. These open-issue e-mails are still on my mind, but I might read them a few times before responding, so I ...