This kind of accusing is destructive to the very core of the partner. If the partners of these toxic abusers try to explain their motives and define what actually was going on (“I asked you several times where you wanted it”), they are again attacked with accusations such as, “You always have to win” or “All you care about is winning!” Such assaults are shockingly evil — and can so deeply traumatize partners they may not recover a full sense of self for years to come.
