The abuser’s indifference, criticism, disregard, and so forth are all felt as a kind of rejection by the partner — as if she, on each one of these occasions, just doesn’t meet his standards. This rejection implies to the partner that she is somehow unacceptable or unworthy. Intermittent rejection breeds confusion and uncertainty. When the partner recognizes her mate’s rejection, she realizes that her joy and vitality cannot be shared with someone who would diminish it.
