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she’d never jiggled her key uncomfortably, or twisted the knob too hard. No, not Tana.
Page 1!
Oh, the bliss I felt when she’d press her cheek to my painted surface, peering through the peephole
Wow
Try as I might, I couldn’t hold back my deadbolt, which slid free with excitement at the touch of her soft cheek.
Tf
The sheer, magnetic attraction of prolonged contact shuddered through me from lintel to doorstop, making me realize I definitely had feelings for her.
Ok then
Every time Randall oozed by, all oily charm, to “check” something at Tana’s apartment, I barely held myself back from slamming across the creep’s spindly fingers.
Kk slay
Even though I was, architecturally-speaking, obligated to support her, I still felt like I was actively providing her comfort. The thought of that warmed me down to my threshold.
Hah
The visitor was an officer, according to the television shows that Tana watched endlessly on weekends, though far less attractive than the ones on the shows.
hehe
My Tana was in danger, and even as sturdy as I was, I’d never felt more helpless.
Bahahah
I’d hate to think there was a dangerous man out here that could hurt one of my favorite tenants.” He winked salaciously
Ewwww
I strained at my hinges,
Whyyy
“So. Hera has told me I must make some….amends…for my affairs. Personally, I think she’s being oversensitive, but women, right? You fuck one girl as a weather event, or a bird, or her own husband and all of a sudden you’re the bad guy.”
Zeus??
“So, hey, good news on that front, though: I’m giving you the chance to convince your lady love in there to set you free.”
Well okayy
See, a lot of things happened in that grove and there was this perfectly-positioned knothole on this really sexy tree and the mead was flowing freely-” he gestured in a rolling circle with his hand. “You get the point.”
so hes son of zeus
Hades mentioned that the skinny twit I’ve seen lurking around your girl sent a woman to the underworld recently.”
Obviously
Tana was in danger, and I was more than a door.
Sure bud sure
Gods did not have to suffer the indignities of Mrs. Scrimshaw's chihuahua lifting a leg on them. I was something lesser,
Ur right ig
I’d seen Tana nude often inside her apartment,
Wow
“A favor, huh? So, what, do you want me to oil your hinges?”
Bahahaha
The man that offered me this-” I pointed back and forth between us, “-said that we must be together. In the way you are with your shivering blue stick.”
I love this book
Why was she so unhappy? She always seemed to be in a very good mood when she used her shivering blue stick.
DEAR LORD
“Because I didn’t realize my goddamn front door was a voyeur, dude!”
Shes not wrong
“Please, Tana. Randall is a murderer.
Ok just putting it out there
He watched you leave, then used some sort of strange key in my lock. He came in and took your pink underwear, the ones you’ve been looking for since last month. He went through your drawers and put everything back, but he took those with him. I wanted to slam on his fingers, believe me I did. I’m so sorry, Tana.”
Randall is gross af
Her lips began moving with no sound as she steadily faded from view, eventually vanishing with a soft pop.
So she woke up loll
While I would much rather have had her soft hands - or more - on my knob,
Oh
“I can’t believe I’m even considering this. I’ve gotta be out of my fucking mind.”
Oh no
“But, I mean, it can’t hurt anything, right? I mean, women fuck cucumbers and bedposts and balloons and shit. This isn’t that weird, right?”
Its gotta be the wine
“Okay, well, I’m just gonna…I’m just going to clean and we’ll see what hap- jesus christ am I seriously talking to a door? Girl, you do not explain yourself to inanimate objects. This is insane. You’re officially nuts.”
Girll
me groan inwardly with pleasure at the sensation. Wrapping my round brass protrusion in a soft cloth and a firm grip, she started polishing my knob with slow, smooth strokes that stirred something deep in my wood.
Jesus
her thumb slipping over my raised lock ridge through the thin barrier of the cloth, almost teasingly.
Oh
A bottle of some kind of clear liquid. A small, shiny gold square with perforated edges. Her shivering blue st- er, vibrator, which currently lay still.
Ok so we doin this
Well, I’m either about to get more kinky than I ever thought I could, or I’m kissing not-a-frog with not-my-lips and breaking some kinda weird curse.” She took a shaky breath, grabbing the shiny square and bringing it to her mouth, tearing it open with her teeth while her eyes stayed fixed on my knob.
A fuckinng condom
While I could occasionally make very small movements in moments of heightened emotion, I took care not to “jiggle” in my frame,
Lord help me
“You know…ooh…maybe there’s something to this. It’s kind of nice calling all the shots.”
This isnt normalb girlie pop
Her ass raised a few inches off the cushion, chasing sensation with a soft gasp. She sat up abruptly, leaving the vibrator to hum and shiver on the ottoman’s surface as she smoothly flipped to rest on all fours, her ass now facing me - and my glistening, waiting knob.
Oh no
Tana held her breath, rocking back to slowly impale herself on her front door. “Oh…god, it’s so big. I…I don’t know if I can…”
Tfffff
knee shifting to press her fully onto my knob, giving a startled gasp as it popped fully into her. “Ohh! Holy shit, that’s weird. Big too. Nice, but...mm…okay…oh god, yes…YES!”
Girllll
Halfway to the small room with the shower, she spun around and made her way back to me, pressing a kiss below my peep hole. “Sorry, don’t mean to uh, bang and run. Hope that was good for you too. Now I need a shower.”
Bro
raising a brow at the fleshy, though still very thick, tube of flesh that replaced my knob.
Oh
The doorway around me was entirely empty now, my new form apparently taking shape in place of my old, sturdy wooden self.
Oh
I followed her gaze down to find the strange sock from earlier hanging off of the thick, protruding rod of flesh between my thighs.
she left the condom on the door knob then...
walked, a little woodenly,
Ha
Human life was proving to be confusing and awkward, while being a door had been fairly straightforward.
Being a door sounds enjoyable tbh
“Right. My shockingly-attractive door has come to life after I fucked him, vowing to protect me against my murderous panty-sniffing super that broke in and poisoned my orange juice. Just another Thursday.”
Yeah pretty much
“Drys, I think you’re allowed to steal a kiss, sweetheart. I kind of buried your knob in my pussy like, a few hours ago.”
Aww
“What’s wrong, big boy? Got a not-so-little problem?”
Whyyy
Something about being called a good door made my human legs feel weak and shaky.
Gasping for AIR
“I’m going to tell you a secret, Drys. I have a weakness for big, strong men who do as they’re told. Good boys who enjoy working for my praise. It makes me feel safe and protected. Do you know anyone like that?”
Dear lord femdom time
I didn’t know exactly what I wanted, what I needed, but I had a feeling Tana knew.
VAGINA!
My ability to speak coherently fell away as my entire existence tried to spill itself into her cleverly-twisting grip. Reality-bending pleasure shot through me in waves as my fingers scraped against the wood beneath them, my shouts echoing off of the bedroom wall in front of me. Once the sensation had faded a little, my human legs really did give up and sent me straight to my knees while clinging to the
Why is it written like thisss
