Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength (Reduce Anxiety and Boost Your Confidence and Self-Esteem with this Self-Help Book for Introverted Women and Men)

by Laurie A. Helgoe

Russ Harris draws on ACT to help people get out of the trap of pursuing happiness by trying to get rid of bad feelings—an effort that ultimately creates more bad feelings. Harris emphasizes that “the things we generally value most in life bring with them a whole range of feelings, both pleasant and unpleasant.” So the gentle, nonjudgmental acceptance of that range of feelings allows people to pursue what they value and ultimately have more satisfying lives.

Introverts are, by nature, travelers. Whether you use the vehicle of literature, cinema, the Internet, the open road, or the limitless sky, you have probably visited many worlds.

Whatever retreats you design for yourself, do them regularly. Protect them. Put them on your calendar and tell others you will not be available during these times. Turn off your cell phone. And melt.

Talk can hurt us, and protecting ourselves from harm is not rude.

“I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work…I want to achieve it through not dying.” —Woody Allen

“All paid jobs absorb and degrade the mind.”

“One may have a blazing hearth in one’s soul, and yet no one ever comes to sit by it.” —Vincent Van Gogh

See the wisdom in your pace, your manner, and your choices—even the bad choices. It’s fine to want to change some things, but change is easier from a position of acceptance. Treat yourself with respect.

“Oh, the comfort—the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person—having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out.” —Dinah Craik

“I said to myself, ‘I have things in my head that are not like what anyone has taught me’…I decided to start anew—to strip away what I had been taught—to accept as true my own thinking.” —Georgia O’Keeffe

Introverts are drawn to mystery, complex ideas, and inner realities. If extroverts seek stimulation, introverts seek to be absorbed, to be fascinated. And, as we succeed in this endeavor, we become fascinating!

An introversion party is three people sprawled on couches and pillows, reading and occasionally talking. Or a couple cuddling by a fire at camp, savoring the music of crackling wood and crickets. Your introversion party might be a solitary walk where thoughts are exposed to air and become clear. You might find your party in meditation, when time expands and everything seems possible. Your party might come with popcorn as you passionately observe the big screen of the theater or with a steaming cup of Ethiopian blend as you watch people from your table at the coffeehouse, or with a cold beer as you watch the world go by from your porch.

“If you are not afraid of the voices inside you, you will not fear the critics outside you.” —Natalie Goldberg