Fracture Me (Shatter Me, #2.5)

by Tahereh Mafi

“I love you,” I finally say to him. “You know that, right? You always come first. Everything I do is to take care of you. To protect you. To provide for you.” James nods. “It’s you first,” I say to him. “It’s always you first and everyone else second. And that’s never going to change. Okay?” James nods again. A tear falls on the floor between us. “Okay, Addie.” “Come here,” I whisper, tugging him into my arms. “We’re going to be okay.” James clings to me, acting more like a child than he has in a long time, and I’m happy to see it. Sometimes I worry he’s growing up way too fast in this shitty world, and though I know I can’t protect him from everything, I still try. He’s been the only constant in my life for as long as I can remember; I think it’d rip me apart if anything happened to him. I’ll never love anyone the way I love this kid.

I might walk onto that battlefield with a beating heart and be dragged off with a dead one.

Kenji grins. “Okay then. Let’s go get our girl back.” “My girl,” I correct him. “She’s my girl.”

James must’ve been terrified. He must’ve been scared out of his mind and still, he snuck out of Omega Point because he wanted to help. Because he wanted to fight alongside us. I could kill him for it. But damn if he’s not one of the bravest people I’ve ever known.

Aren’t you in love with this girl? Where’s the fire under your ass? I thought you would be dying to get to her right now—”

I love Juliette. I really do. I want to help her and support her and be there for her. I want us to have a future together. But sometimes I wonder if it’s ever going to happen. This isn’t easy to admit, but part of me doesn’t want to put James at risk again—on the run again—for a girl who broke up with me. A girl who walked away from us. I don’t know what the right thing is anymore. I don’t know if my allegiance is to James or Juliette.