Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West (Wicked Years, #1)

by Gregory Maguire

It was beautiful hair, in an odd, awful way, with a shine like the pelt of a healthy giltebeest. Black silk. Coffee spun into threads. Night rain. Galinda, not given to metaphor on the whole, found Elphaba’s hair entrancing, the more so because the girl was otherwise so ugly.

But Elphaba dropped the whole sugary plate onto her strange pointed head, and looked at Galinda again from underneath the broad brim. She seemed like a rare flower, her skin stemlike in its soft pearlescent sheen, the hat a botanical riot. ‘Oh Miss Elphaba,’ said Galinda, ‘you terrible mean thing, you’re pretty.’

‘Entrancing,’ she said. ‘There’s some strange exotic quality of beauty about you. I never thought.’ ‘Surprise,’ said

‘As for the Vinkus, we don’t imagine we’ll need an Adept stationed there, at least not in your lifetimes. The master plans eradicate any appreciable population in that godforsaken place.’

Holy fuck!

Glinda didn’t really lose consciousness, but the uncomfortable physical nearness of hawk-faced Elphaba after that undesired act of desire made her want to shiver with revulsion and to purr at the same time. ‘Steady on, girl, not here,’ said Elphaba, ‘resist, come on!’ Resist was just what Glinda didn’t want to do.

‘Come on, Glinda – you’ve got better brains – come on! I love you too much, snap out of it, you idiot!’

‘Well, really,’ she said as Elphaba dumped her on a heap of moldy packing straw. ‘No need to be so romantic about it!’ But she felt better, as if a wave of illness had just passed.

She put her face against Glinda’s and kissed her. ‘Hold out, if you can,’ she murmured, and kissed her again. ‘Hold out, my sweet.’

Elphaba looked annoyed and her back stiffened.

Oh jealous are we Elphaba? 😉

Meant as a joke, her remark was stiff and unfunny. ‘Is she a mother?’

Definitely jealous

And Glinda, dear Glinda.

Oh Elphie pining for her ex

think all this is new to me,’ she said, sighing. ‘You think I am such a virgin.’

… Glinda….

Elphie-Fae would never tell him what she had been doing in the chapel of Saint Glinda attached to the mauntery in Saint Glinda’s Square.

Pinning for Glinda obviously

what do you hear from Elphaba?’

Ah there it is…

‘You never told me that, Crope.’

Crope’s in trouble

‘Oil, I think,’ said Fiyero. They both looked at him. ‘That is, in the Vinkus,’ he stammered, ‘the elderly rub oil into their skin instead of water – I’ve always assumed that’s what Elphie did. I don’t know. Glinda, if I were to meet up with you again, what’s a good day?’

You fell right into Glinda’s trap there

‘How I regret that I won’t meet Sir Chuffrey.’

Ouch bring up the beard, Fiyero totally gets that if it was a competition between them Glinda wins hands down

‘If you should see her,’ said Glinda lightly, ‘tell her I miss her still.’

There’s the rub of it

He didn’t tell her about Glinda.

He’s totally threatened by her and is right to be!

Also, Fiyero didn’t want to make Elphie’s life harder than it was.

He knows Elphie’s still in love with Glinda

She opened the huge door to find a figure crouched like a monkey in the dark corner of the stone porch. Beyond, snow was wrinkling the facade of the adjacent Church of Saint Glinda, making it look like a reflection in water, only right way up.

So in Elphie’s moment of need who does she think of but Glinda

Elphie thought of sending a note to Glinda, if after all these years she was still there – but, being unable to decide yes, she decided no.

Poor Elphie still whipped

‘Legendary?’ Elphie said.

I take it you agree

‘I knew her a bit,’ Elphie said, her mouth forgetting to shut itself. She was having a hard time keeping up with the multiple narrators. ‘I haven’t seen her in years.’

There it is

Glinda of the Arduennas, remember her? Married to Sir Chuffrey, and gone a bit to seed, in my humble opinion.

Probing for a response?

‘Miss Glinda of the Arduennas,’ she said, her heart churring.

Still feeling for the ex…

‘Oh, you came, I knew you would,’ said Glinda. ‘Miss Elphaba, the last true Eminent Thropp, no matter what they say!’

You know your girl Glinda

It was not just the novelty of seeing her again, but the strange charisma Elphaba possessed, which had always put Glinda in the shade. Also there was the thrill, basis indeterminable,

So Glinda’s still smitten with Elphie

how she and Elphie had shared a bed on the road to the Emerald City. How brave that had made her feel, and how vulnerable too.

Sounds like a euphemism, they totally made love on that journey

‘Murder is a word used by the sanctimonious,’ he said. ‘It is an expedient expression with which they condemn any courageous action beyond their ken. What I did, what I do, cannot be murder. For, coming from another world, I cannot be held accountable to the silly conventions of a naive civilization. I am beyond that lisping childish recital of wrongs and rights.’ His eyes did not burn as he spoke; they were sunk behind veils of cold blue detachment.

Fucking hell what a monster! Elphie should kill him where he stands!

‘You should not trust my promise,’

Even he knows he’s a piece of shit

She had no intention of surrendering the Grimmerie to such a monster, ever.

Good!

cried out, ‘Oh Elphie!’ The Witch did not turn. They never saw each other again.

😭