If This Isn't Nice, What Is?: Advice for the Young

by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

I’ll pass on to you what another Methuselah said to me. He’s Joe Heller, author, as you know, of Catch-22. We were at a party thrown by a multi-billionaire out on Long Island, and I said, “Joe, how does it make you feel to realize that only yesterday our host probably made more money than Catch-22, one of the most popular books of all time, has grossed worldwide over the past forty years?” Joe said to me, “I have something he can never have.” I said, “What’s that, Joe?” And he said, “The knowledge that I’ve got enough.” His example may be of comfort to many of you Adams and Eves, who in later years will have to admit that something has gone terribly wrong—and that, despite the education you received here, you have somehow failed to become billionaires.