I realized I didn’t need or want the more superficial or insincere praise as much anymore, the fleeting attention. None of that had helped me in my hardest times. External praise was a Band-Aid, easily ripped away. I still have an ego, but I’m trying to value being settled from within. To realize that building my own resilience feels good and nourishing, whereas the outside noise was only a tenuous prop holding me up. Maybe that comes easily for some people, but for me it is a hard thing to hold on to.
