The Eyes Are the Best Part

by Monika Kim

More than anything, he hated that everything in his life served as a reminder of his failures. I don’t blame him. Maybe because I know what it’s like, to live a life so defined by want. That’s why I was able to recognize it in him—it was what I had been feeling for so long.

Good opportunities ruined by circumstance.

His boldness repulses me.

His "apprecition" for other cultures indeed...

The book he was holding earlier is nowhere to be found. He looks almost annoyed, which makes me nervous.

As if his feminism is a performative shield.

Fate can bring you together, but it can just as easily tear you apart. All I can do is accept my palja, in the same way my father had to accept his.

“The choices you make absolutely matter. Put it this way: the major events in your life are predetermined, but the way you reach those events, the paths that you take? Those are shaped by your choices.

Luck and life paths intertwined with circumstance.

For so long I had succumbed to the idea that I was powerless against my palja, that all I could do was strap myself in for the ride. But Alexis might be right.

Alexis introducing dimension.

“What? Why are you upset with me?” He asks, offended. “I didn’t do anything wrong.

Admission of guilt.

Every time I see them, I feel small. I feel like I am responsible for every unhappiness and injustice she has ever experienced. Why couldn’t I have been born a boy? Someone strong and confident who would be capable of taking care of her?

Still punishing herself.

Even when I say no, he pushes and pushes until I say yes.

Concerning to say the least.

Her kindness and generosity are heavy in my hand.

I thought of you immediately when I saw them. They’re so beautiful and elegantly designed. It was between those and a little porcelain doll that looked exactly like you.

All he sees is a stereotype of her "exoticness" despite his feminist persona.

Little Oriental girls are nothing to worry about.” “Oriental? What am I, a rug?” “You young kids get offended so easily. And at the silliest things.

Again, fetishizing a stereotype and getting offended when the victim objects.

The only power he has is the power you are willing to give him, and you’ve given him nothing. Not a scrap. By the time you’re done with him, he’ll be begging for mercy. Who is he if he can’t control you? Is he even a man anymore? It will seem like a relief when you give him a hand, even if that hand is holding a blade. And when you take everything from him, you can say what these men say about us: He was asking for it. He was begging for it. He must have wanted it, since he didn’t fight back.

Her kindness is overwhelming. I clutch the fork, trembling. She’s lovely, so lovely, and I don’t know whether I’m embarrassed or grateful.

Kindess from friends is almost foreign after her sabotage of the other group and the way Geoffrey's nature was revealed.

I don’t know why Alexis is trying to stop you from being my friend but I swear whatever she’s telling you is a lie. It’s not true!

Admission of guilt.

How do I explain to her that the home I miss isn’t a place? It’s a time when my life made sense. When things made sense.

You only care about what he left for you. Or in this case, what he didn’t leave behind.

Sense of entitlement to what he wants to possess.

Hope is a terrible thing.

Then one day, a sign went up. The lot was sold. We watched as the weeds were cleared, as someone else who wasn’t us began building a house that didn’t match any of our expectations. The house grew and grew until one day, the construction stopped. Since then, it’s been complete silence. All that’s left is a skeleton, wood planks and tarps battered by the wind.

The corpse of a house stagnating in their dream space.

Instead of dying quietly like he’s supposed to, Backward Cap screams.

The second time she's botched the knifework.

It’s not Backward Cap. It’s George.

No. It’s not George. It’s Geoffrey.

Trust me. What are you afraid of?”

Admission of guilt.

We belong together.”

TERRIFYING.

“My mother is my business.”