I can understand wanting to try this out. I can understand thinking, Hmm . . . maybe this will do something and experimenting a little. But for the past three years, you’ve spent the entire duration of every walk strangling yourselves on the off chance that maybe this time it will work. It’s never going to work, dogs. No matter how hard you pull, it’s never going to make me think, “You know what? Maybe it would be sort of fun to walk in the middle of the street with all the cars . . . and maybe I do want to go splashing around in the duck pond in the middle of December.” You aren’t allowed to
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