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There was only her. My one, my only, my wife.
There was no resting for me, and I would not become one of those ruptured beings who had forgotten their own name. I would remain Hail Vega and stand at the side of my wife for all of eternity.
“Oh, in the valley of the fruit of my loins, sweet Petunia shall rise and claim her salmon,”
“My daughters have been forged in a fire far hotter than any a Dragon might hope to tame.”
“Regardless of who might like to kick whose ass, it’s safe to say that Roxanya’s taste in men leaves a lot to be desired,” Merissa interrupted, the look she gave me letting me know that she’d seen all there was of the mistakes I’d made.
But The Veil was dragging me back as Gabriel lost consciousness and Merissa cried my name, reaching for me as the light stuttered out. Her hand found mine in the dark. Always and forever, we found each other this way. No matter if all light was lost, our souls would unite across the boundaries of the universe, never to part. “I’ve got you,” I called to her, pulling her in against my chest and feeling our souls almost merge as we twisted through the cloying dark. “Don’t let go,” she called, fear wrapped around her words. “Never, my love.”
I was confounded at the trouble my children were capable of meeting with the moment I took my eyes off of them.
“You will like bunnies always, I think,” my wife murmured, kissing Gwendalina’s smooth black hair. I stroked my finger down Roxanya’s nose as she curled into me. “You are always so content, my little love,” I said. “Except when you are cold or sleepy or hungry.” “The same as you then,” Merissa jibed, and Gabriel laughed as a smirk pulled at my mouth.
Merissa arched a brow at me and mouthed, “Stop being an asshole.” I sighed. Though that request was rather late in the game of existence.
“Have you been sent into death to torment me?”
“I have better things to do than torment an old relic who lost his crown long ago,” Darius said, irking me more. “You know, most men find it in their interest to win the favour of their father in laws,” I said icily. “Was I meant to hold a seance every night to try and contact you? To sing you songs and offer you little trinkets?” Darius asked dryly. “And by the way, how’s your relationship going with Merissa’s father? I hear you had to bribe him and his entire kingdom to let you keep his daughter after you stole her.” “Her father was an arrogant piece of shit who had no time for me
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“My taste is fire and ruin tempered by the kiss of a woman who has always and will always be out of my league,”
“The whole world is on a baking scale, my dear,” Hamish replied. “Bagels on the hoppity morn, scones in a crisis, jam tarts to alert the masses, and flans for a flap of flantastic design.”
“Flans are the work of devils and maybugs,” she whispered like she thought she might be overheard. “And I feel a whole pallet of them baking in my wobbling waters.”
“Gerry-jammmm! Gerry-jam we are watching from the never-more! Love you, my beauteous sock puppet!”
Even in death we were infatuated with one another, her taste as sweet as it had been in life. She could never truly die in my eyes, her soul would shine on no matter where we went, and mine would follow ever on, the two of us dancing away into the darkness of the universe if that was the only place left to go.
I hadn’t exactly been overjoyed when my son found a father figure in a private investigator who had a fondness for hookers, but at least Bill Fortune had been there for him.
“Shit a potato, it’s the Savage King.”
“This is my pride,” Felisia announced, practically glowing as she looked between the three of them with love brimming in her eyes. “Well…technically everyone in life thought Purrsy was our king, but I was always head cat, right Purrsy?” “Always,” he smirked. “She’s our queen,” Furnanda breathed, a want in her eyes that blazed as she looked upon the Lioness Shifter who had claimed her. “Our everything,” Kitsy added. “And you’re mine,” Felisia said,
“I’ve been watching the war. My favourite descendants have gotten themselves in such trouble. One in the rebel army, another locked in Darkmore. I love the chaos my family creates.”
“Before an orgy descends, can you get the information we came for,” I muttered to Azriel as Kitsy went hurrying over to join their heated embrace. “Fucking cats,” Marcel growled, straightening out his wings.
“Lance Orion,” she said with a light laugh. “My descendant Leon likes him. He licked him once, you know?” “That makes him his,” Kitsy said, and Felisia nodded her agreement with a serious look. “Right, well, okay,” Azriel said, clearly unsure how to respond to that.
I was Felisia Night, and one day, everyone was going to know my name.
We formed the Dashing Outcast Nerds Group. And I shall never, upon my nelly, forget the bond we have forged in the dark valley of the D.O.N.G.”
“That’s mine,” Darius hissed as he looked at the priceless stone, smoke spilling between his lips. “The dead don’t get to keep possession of any treasures, fool,” Hail muttered, and Darius growled like a feral beast. “Bullshit. That crystal is mine and the rest of my treasure is mine too and I’ll be back to claim it before any other fucker can lay their hands on it,” Darius snapped.
“Not for a moment, nor a breath, nor a fraction between seconds have I ever doubted my path. And you are not my bane, Hail Vega, you are my fate. I would not forgo you nor my children even if I were offered another entire lifetime in the sun in exchange for you all.”
“Well I believe two legendary women would enjoy quite the evening together talking of all things legendary.”
My nerves meant I’d had no appetite for breakfast at all this morning, only eating a bowl of oatmeal, two apples and a questionable nectarine. Oh and those wild strawberries I’d picked outside Terra House. I was practically running on empty.
“Not saplings, of course,” Marigold said. “And I have a general aversion to pines because of their arrogance. Evergreen trees in general have a rather haughty demeanour, but the deciduous trees…oh yes, they are far more inviting. I am currently in an open relationship with a gentle sycamore and a titillating oak. They have such rough bark…”
I wasn’t sure I saw any value in having just witnessed Felisia fucking her best friend, but apparently, I’d had no choice in the matter.
“I once stole a medallion straight off of Lionel’s neck and tossed it in the lake at Zodiac Academy,” Hail commented. “Never thought I’d see anyone throw such a bitch fit again in my lifetime, but it looks like you might be hoping to claim that title.”
“Oh Kitty,” he breathed. “Never fear. Your boy has the heart of a walrus.”
Radcliff was grappling with an iron candle stick on the wall which he seemed convinced was the answer to their problems. “Surely this ugly thing must have a purpose!” Radcliff cried. “An entrance to a secret tunnel or a panic room perhaps. Why else would someone have such a hideous thing hung on their wall?”
“Come on, old palace friend. Remember me?” I said through my teeth. “Good palace. Daddy Hail is here,” Radcliff said, placing a hand on my shoulder and lending me his strength. “Now open your door nice and wide for him.” “Stop that,” Merissa clipped, and Radcliff laughed, clearly loving the chaos of all this.
“I shall give you my deepest seed of power, oh great Vegas,” Hamish called over the wailing song and Max blasted the doors apart, clearly intending to leave. “I will summon it from my banded balls.” “Stop talking,” I gritted out, trying to focus and Radcliff laughed harder.
“Get fucked, Lame Lionel!” Radcliff cried.
This was actually happening. I was standing in the afterlife, haunting two of my closest friends in the world, watching as they shattered all the parameters I thought had existed within their friendship and- Oh for fuck’s sake, I did not need to see Caleb’s cock.
“Did you just summon your mother-in-law to watch your friends fucking?”
Seth howled loud enough to rattle the damn walls as he came, Caleb groaning as he fucking swallowed and I was caught holding eye contact with Hail motherfucking Vega the entire time.
Caleb knocked the Dragon dick vibrator from the bed, causing it to fly straight through Hail’s ass. My lips parted, but honestly, what the fuck was I supposed to say when a golden Dragon cock had accidentally penetrated him?
I was going to have a lot of fun with my best friends when I saw them again, and they would rue the day they used unlicensed sex toys with my face on them.
“It’s not coming with us,” Lance muttered, and Gwendalina arched a brow at him. “Firstly, do not boss her around,” I growled. “Secondly, you have a point.” “It seems friendly enough,” Merissa said, moving closer to it and reaching out to pet its side despite the fact it couldn’t feel her.
“Says who?” Gwendalina balked. “She clearly doesn’t want to be married,” I said. “Says me,” Lance snapped and I rounded on him. “Watch your tone, boy,” I snarled. “I will wed you the moment this war is over,” Lance said, and I had a mind to clip him around the ear. “He’s possessive. Now who does that remind me of?” Merissa sung and Azriel nodded, looking at me.
I’ll be taking it up with him beyond the Veil, but as we’re currently on two different planes, and I don’t plan on dying anytime soon, he’ll have to wait for the ass kicking I plan on presenting him with in the afterlife,” Gabriel said to Lance. “You, however, don’t get to escape me via death, so you’d better be nice as pie to me if you’re determined to marry my sister.”
“You were a dastardly duck upon our meeting, now you’ve shed your feathers, and oh how jolly proud I am to see the great Fae you have become,” Hamish gushed, knocking his knuckles against Darius’s cheek. “Revel in your moment with your beloved quail, then return to us as swiftly as a goose with its tail on fire.”
“You’re Darius Vega now. And you weren’t built to bow to anyone.”
“I love you, Roxanya Vega, and I wish I could have been worthy of you.”
“The Savage King was the oldest thing, And he had a black soul too-oo-oo. But the best thing about him was his wife. And the fact he looked like a poo-oo-oo.” A roar of laughter carried from the souls around me and I looked down, realising she had forced an illusion over me to make me look like a shit dressed in golden robes.
“Hamish Grus was as big as a walrus, And he kinda looked like one too-oo-oo. But the best thing about him was his fine moustache, And the fact he only had one shoe-oo-oo.” Hamish looked down at his feet in confusion and Felisia swatted him over the head with the shoe she had somehow stolen from his foot.
“Do me next!” Radcliff jumped into Felisia’s path. “The dead Acrux didn’t achieve so much, And his brother was bigger too-oo-oo.” “Actually, don’t do me,” Radcliff grumbled, but Felisia sang on. “But the best thing about him was he wasn’t lame. And the fact he was hotter too-oo-oo.” “Oh.” Radcliff beamed. “On second thoughts, I rather liked that – but Lame Lionel isn’t bigger than me!” he called after her as she pranced away. “Yes, he is,” she sang back. “No, he isn’t,” Radcliff snarled. “Yes, he isssss,” she sang louder, strumming her banjo wildly to drown him out.
