Felix (New York Players #4)

by Lulu Moore

“I’ve always wondered what your lips would feel like against mine.”

Because here’s a secret I’ve never told anyone. Not one living soul. I used to be in love with Felix Cleverly. And after tonight, after that kiss, I’m pretty sure I still am.

Because the basic facts were, that kiss, that kiss I’d been waiting twelve years for, that kiss that was still imprinted on my lips, was the best kiss of my life.

“Do you always ignore all your patients? Because I’ve got to say, this is shitty follow up care. And just so you know I’m giving you a one star in the hospital stay comment form. I would have given you zero stars, but you did fix my leg.”

I was tired from not sleeping, because every time I shut my eyes I dreamed of kissing her, of feeling her lips against mine again. Fuck, even dreaming to just see her again. I was tired from wondering what she meant about her feelings. I was tired of trying to figure out mine. And I was tired from not seeing her.

since Drew met Emerson that had stopped dead, because even when they hadn’t been together he couldn’t see anyone else but her.

DREW GIRLIE FOR LIFE 🥹🩷

since Emerson had come along I’d never seen Drew happier, even when he’d been really fucking happy, she had brought it up a level I didn’t know existed. Like Golden Retriever level happy. And I kind of liked it. I liked seeing him happy.

Will I highlight every time he and Emerson comes up? Yes yes I will

When she’d have a panic about her exams and needed help, I’d quiz her. I started sending her random and complex medical questions on a daily basis to find out if she knew the answer. I even bought a copy of the textbook her nose was always in, so I’d know if she’d got them right.

My fingers started tracing back and forth on my leg, over my scars. My Molly marks. Molly Marks. My permanent reminders of her. She would now, forever and always be with me in a way she’d never been before.

“I think if there’s the smallest chance you could find love like I have, then you should go for it. Guys, love is awesome, you gotta just go for it.” He clasped his palm to his chest, right over his heart. “Emerson is my person and Molly is your person,

I want to know, how long have you liked me?” “Loved you!” Her fists clenched against her sides, before she took a deep breath. “If you want to talk about it, it’s how long have I loved you. How long have I been in love with you, and that would be twelve years.”

“I want a chance to prove myself, Molly. I deserve that. I want to be good enough for you.”

“I’ve dreamed about our kiss every night, but it’s all in pieces. I can’t remember it, and it’s all I want to remember. What was our kiss like, Mol? Tell me.” Her eyes flared golden, her chest heaving. “Why are you so close to me?” I ran my thumb along her jaw, brushing her soft cheek. I’d never touched her like this before, never realized how soft her skin was. “Because I can’t kiss you from across the room, and I want to know what it was like so I can remember for real.” “You… you’re going to kiss me?” Her chest stopped moving. “Breathe, Mol. You need to breathe.” “I can’t, you’re too close.” “Get used to it, because I’m not leaving.”

this was a kiss to end all kisses. A kiss of discovery. A kiss of beginnings, a start to everything… and I could feel my anxiety melting away. This was a kiss I was supposed to be in. A kiss that was meant to be. A kiss I was struggling to comprehend why I hadn’t known about it before. Was this a kiss I could have been having for twelve fucking years?

How many cells does the brain contain? And for an extra bonus point, how many of mine are currently thinking about you? (Answer – all of them)

I know this is new and we’re figuring things out, but we’re not a dirty secret.

“Do I need to pick a tree on the way or are we doing that together?” “Together.” “Correct answer,” his face lit up and his voice softened, “because that’s how it’s going to be from now on.”

everything had suddenly become crystal clear; that the last twelve years of our friendship was the dress rehearsal for what was about to happen. For the rest of our lives. Together.

“Fuck. Okay. Fuck, Clevs. Don’t let that baby come until I get there. Please. I mean it.” Not sure how the fuck I was going to manage that.

Lol

She was so fucking beautiful, and I still wasn’t sure how I’d become the lucky bastard she’d fallen for, but there was no fucking way I was letting go. She was mine now.

“While we’re not taking any questions at this time, I can confirm that Molly and I are together. And we’re leaving. Happy New Year, guys.”

“When you stop, I stop.” “Drew...” He shook his head. “I’m serious. I’m not playing without you. And if the last few months have shown me anything, it’s that I don’t want to. We’ll do something else. We can start a foundation or coach or do anything we want.”

Bromance of all bromances

“Don’t forget Freddie’s playlist was his idea.” Her eyes narrowed as she remembered. “Oh yes, wonder how many other presents he’s come up with that the boys have taken credit for.”

Happy Valentine’s Day, Mol. The first one of forever. I love love love you. Felix xxx P.S. Do you know how many times a day the human heart beats? About one hundred thousand, and all of my heartbeats are for you <3

“You think I don’t know that our lives will revolve around your job? That you won’t always come home when you say you will? That when we have kids, I’ll be the one on diaper duty and doing the school drop off? I get that. I’m not the one changing lives here, you are.” Her bloodshot eyes bore through me. “We’re having kids?” “Yes we fucking are! We’re a family, dammit, and that’s what I see in our future. Don’t you?”

I don’t like failing, and I didn’t want to fail at us. My heart aches all the time from loving you, and if we don’t work out, then I don’t know if I can cope with that.”

“Are you sure you know what you’re doing?” “No, I don’t have a fucking clue. But I know she needs to want it, she needs to want to be with me and believe me when I say I’m not going anywhere. I can’t help her do that because she doesn’t hear me when I tell her.”